10 Things Only People Raised By Really Strict Parents Will Understand (2024)

FAQs

How did being raised by strict parents impact your life? ›

Kids raised with strict discipline tend to have antisocial behavioral problems such as rebellion, anger, aggression, and delinquency. Although some parents think that strict parenting produces better-behaved kids, studies show that such a parenting style actually produces kids that have more behavioral problems.

Strict parenting deprives kids of the opportunity to internalize self-discipline and responsibility. Harsh limits may temporarily control behavior, but they don't help a child learn to self-regulate. Instead, harsh limits trigger a resistance to taking responsibility for themselves.

You Don't Offer Choices. Rather than ask, “Would you rather put your clothes away first or make your bed?” strict parents often bark orders. Giving kids a little freedom, especially when both choices are good ones, can go a long way to gaining compliance.

Research has shown that any parenting style can affect everything about a child's mental and physical development, from weight to emotional well-being. So if you were raised in a strict home then it's important to realize that your physical and mental health may have suffered.

Research shows that most people think strict parenting produces better-behaved kids. However, research studies on discipline consistently show that strict, or authoritarian, child-raising actually produces kids with lower self esteem who behave worse than other kids — and therefore get punished more!

Young children's sneakiness can be attributed to wanting something that is missing or forbidden, an urge they have that can't be satisfied. Their wishes are very strong at this young age; having those wishes denied results in angry feelings.

18, 2022 -- Strict parenting causes changes in children's brains that increase their risk of mental health issues, including depression, later in life, a new study says.

“The common problem that I found is from the family environment they grow up in. Those with strict parents and when parenting features threats and violent behavior,” he said. Such pressures can lead to sleep deprivation, eating disorders, anxiety, low self-esteem and poor academic performance, he added.

What type of parents are the most strict? ›

What is Authoritarian Parenting? Authoritarian parents tend to be the most strict parents out there and opposite of permissive parents. They tend to have lots of rules and regulations, but aren't willing to engage in any discussion about the rules, or accept their children's feedback or opinions about them.

The most common toxic behavior of parents is to criticize their child, express self-wishes, complain about the difficulties of raising a child, make unhealthy comparisons, and make hurtful statements^​1​.

Research shows strict parenting leads to sneakier kids with a lower self esteem. According to Aha Parenting, kids raised with strict rules tend to be more rebellious, and better liars. “Harsh limits may temporarily control behavior, but they don't help a child learn to self-regulate.

Research Says Strict Parenting Can Turn Kids Into Liars

It might be time to ease up on the rules. If your child has been telling a few too many fibs lately, your parenting style might be partly to blame. According to some experts, children who have overly strict parents are quicker to lie—and they're better at it, too.

Why experts agree authoritative parenting is the most effective style. Studies have found that authoritative parents are more likely to raise confident kids who achieve academic success, have better social skills and are more capable at problem-solving.

1-2-3 Magic divides the parenting responsibilities into three straightforward tasks: controlling negative behavior, encouraging good behavior, and strengthening the child-parent relationship. The program seeks to encourage gentle, but firm, discipline without arguing, yelling, or spanking.

Koala parenting. Also known as attachment parenting, this style describes the way in which a parent may look to form a close bond with a child from day one. This could mean breastfeeding for as long as possible, sleeping with the baby close by or co-sleeping when safe to do so, and babywearing.

What age do kids start being sneaky? ›

Between the ages of 5 and 8, children will tell more lies to test what they can get away with, especially lies related to school -- classes, homework, teachers, and friends. Maintaining the lies may still be difficult, even though they are becoming better at concealing them.

If your daughter blatantly ignores you, or says, “I've barely watched any”, or starts crying just to get her way she is using manipulation. In a nut shell, if your children are being disrespectful, using mean words, or other forms of power to bully you into giving them their way– they are manipulating.

Toxic-appearing infants and children are pale or cyanotic, lethargic or inconsolably irritable. In addition, they may have tachypnea and tachycardia with poor capillary refill. A variety of conditions other than infection may result in a toxic appearance.

Children and adolescents with anxiety disorders are more likely to be raised by non-authoritative parents (e.g. overprotective, authoritarian, and neglectful styles), who tend to employ exaggerated (e.g. preventing autonomy), harsh, or inconsistent control.

Turns out adolescents with controlling parents are often defiant and lack trust in their parents, the study says. Researchers also found that the controlled kids exhibit delinquent behavior because they don't see their parents as “legitimate authority figures.”

Kids raised by authoritative parents are more likely to become independent, self-reliant, socially accepted, academically successful, and well-behaved. They are also less likely to report depression and anxiety, and less likely to engage in antisocial behavior like delinquency and drug use.

Looking at strict parenting from a beneficial standpoint, some would say that it creates self-discipline, establishes the idea of responsibility and accountability, and also instills some sort of fear in that child to never want to disobey.

Some of the common signs of a toxic parent or parents include: Highly negatively reactive. Toxic parents are emotionally out of control. They tend to dramatize even minor issues and see any possible slight as a reason to become hostile, angry, verbally abusive, or destructive.

A toxic childhood could include any of the following experiences: Your emotional needs weren't met by caretakers. Your parents were controlling, neglectful, or overprotective. You experienced abuse (e.g. physical, verbal, emotional, sexual).

What does a toxic mom look like? ›

Toxic mothers often lack empathy with their children and are inconsistent in expressing love, understanding, and warmth. This may be because they came from toxic families themselves where empathy was not expressed. Unfortunately, a lack of empathy can lead to a poor bond between mother and child.

Collaborative approach: Dolphin parenting can be a more collaborative approach than some of the other classic parenting styles. They aim to guide and support but also promote independent choices and creativity. They try setting achievable and realistic expectations but still encourage their child to work hard.

They become quite independent as they reach 5-6 years of age, even wanting to help you with some of the chores! This is probably why most parents look at age 6 as the magical age when parenting gets easier.

South Africa, Italy and Portugal have the strictest parents. To come up with the ranking of parental paranoia, researchers conducted interviews with 18,303 children and a sampling of their parents in 16 countries.

Threatening to take away your teen's phone may seem like a great way to get them to do something. But it's usually not a good choice as a punishment. When you take away their phone, you're turning off the television, banning games, taking away their ability to talk with friends, and grounding them all at once.

Simply put, the best way to handle strict parents is to minimize conflicts in day-to-day life, take good care of yourself, and plan for the future. This stage is only a small part of your entire life. When the time comes, good health and education will allow you to live a better adult life.

According to Newsweek, parents are harder on older kids because they want to use them as an example for younger kids. The thought is that if older siblings are acting in a manner that appears to be "reckless" and they get away with it, younger siblings will follow. Therefore, parents are stricter with older kids.

Emotionally absent or cold mothers can be unresponsive to their children's needs. They may act distracted and uninterested during interactions, or they could actively reject any attempts of the child to get close. They may continue acting this way with adult children.

Parental gaslighting is a subtle and covert form of emotional abuse. These parents manipulate to undermine the child's sense of reality and mental stability. Some well-meaning parents may gaslight their children in an attempt to protect them.

How do Toxic Parents Act? ›

Toxic parents may invade your privacy or not allow you to make your own decisions. Or maybe they're overly critical and controlling of your decisions, even as an adult. Manipulative behaviors. Your parent may try to control you by using guilt or shame to play with your emotions.

Hurting words slash at a child's self-confidence: "You're stupid." "What a slob!" "You're disgusting." "You're worthless." Helping words show you care and make a child feel worthwhile and secure: "You can do it." "Great job." "You're beautiful." "I'm proud of you."

Whether to comfort or to discipline, telling your child to stop crying isn't the way to go. Holding back tears restricts her emotions. She misses out on learning opportunities to manage her feelings. And it's ineffective—rarely does a child stop crying when told to.

Motherhood teaches you what unconditional love feels like before it begins to be tainted by life's challenges. Therefore, it adds a fresh new pair of eyes to what is really important and the notion that settling isn't the way to go about anything!

“Be respectful,” “be thankful for what you have” and “honesty is the best policy” are the top three life lessons American parents hope to teach their children, according to a new survey. Rounding out the top five life lessons parents want to instill are “never give up” and “learn from your mistakes.”

Parents want their kids to stay out of trouble, do well in school, and go on to do awesome things as adults. And while there isn't a set recipe for raising successful children, psychologists have pointed to several factors that predict success.

It is clear that childhood has an effect on our adulthood, our early experiences shape our belief about ourselves, others and the world. Therefore, we learn rules to protect our self-belief as it may make us vulnerable. In doing this, we form dysfunctional behaviours, which then can lead to mental health problems.

As a parent, you influence your child's basic values, like religious values, and issues related to their future, like educational choices. And the stronger your relationship with your child, the more influence you'll have, because your child will be more likely to seek your guidance and value your opinion and support.

Kids raised by authoritative parents are more likely to become independent, self-reliant, socially accepted, academically successful, and well-behaved. They are also less likely to report depression and anxiety, and less likely to engage in antisocial behavior like delinquency and drug use.

Children that grow up with authoritarian parents are often well-behaved . This is because strict parents set clear expectations of a child's behavior, and children know what's expected of them. Behaving well is driven by fear. Children understand if they don't live up to expectations, there will be consequences.

What are the signs of childhood trauma? ›

Traumatic experiences can initiate strong emotions and physical reactions that can persist long after the event. Children may feel terror, helplessness, or fear, as well as physiological reactions such as heart pounding, vomiting, or loss of bowel or bladder control.

Childhood trauma in adults also results in feeling disconnected, and being unable to relate to others. Studies have shown that adults that experience childhood trauma were more likely to struggle with controlling emotions, and had heightened anxiety, depression, and anger.

Children don't have the ability to understand their role in complex issues. Therefore, trauma can lead to feelings of personal responsibility, lack of stability, feelings of shame or guilt, and a mistrust of those around them. These symptoms can occur in childhood and remain into adulthood.

Formal cultural consensus analysis of responses met criteria for strong agreement that the period for greatest impact of parenting on a child's development occurs at adolescence, at a median age of 12 years.

Common knowledge, parents influence their children's development and personality. Whether we want to admit it or not, parents are a child's most influential role model. As parents, we spend more time with our children than any other adult. We model to our children our values, as well as our likes/dislikes.

Research shows a common reaction for parents with unresolved trauma is to emotionally separate for their children, often neglecting their emotional needs. Parenting naturally creates an environment where you, and your children, are often exposed to a host of vulnerable emotions – sadness, guilt, love, anger, etc.

Why experts agree authoritative parenting is the most effective style. Studies have found that authoritative parents are more likely to raise confident kids who achieve academic success, have better social skills and are more capable at problem-solving.

Strict parenting can turn children into adept liars as they do not feel safe telling the truth, experts have claimed.

Research suggests that kids do better when their parents show affection and enforce age-appropriate limits on their children's behavior (see below). There is also evidence linking permissive parenting with the development of poor self-control.