7 Reasons You Should Never Date a Bartender (2024)

2. Half of your date nights will be visiting them at work.

One workaround for the aforementioned schedule situation is that you can visit them at their job. Free drinks are a perk, for sure, but being at your significant other’s workplace gets old fast. You don’t want to overstay your welcome with their co-workers and bosses. Plus, you never know if it will be so busy that it’s not even worth it for you to be there.

3. You may lose your favorite bar.

Another potential consequence of dating a bartender is that when you break up, you may feel uncomfortable going back to the bar where they work. Depending on how long you dated, you can usually resume bar visits once there has been an adequate grace period. But it will always be a little awkward, especially if you’re with a date.

4. You need to be very trusting or have clear boundaries.

Flirting is part of a bartender’s job. We usually don’t mean anything by it, but it takes a secure partner to feel comfortable with that scenario. And if you aren’t in an exclusive relationship, you need to expect that your bartender date may be picking up other dates while at work. Which means no impromptu visits to their job, unless you’re invited. This situation can work, but it will challenge your jealousy gene.

5. They’re not the same at work as they are at home.

Because we expend most of our social energy at work, bartenders often need quiet time on our days off. This can be hard when you’re dating a new person. They often expect you to be the fun-loving, energetic bartender personality that they first met, and it can be disappointing when your off-duty vibe is much different.

6. Alcohol will likely be a part of your relationship.

Most bartenders are either completely sober or total drinkers with not much in-between. This means that alcohol (or lack thereof) will always be a part of your relationship. Depending on your relationship with alcohol, this can range from a non-issue to dealbreaker. The most toxic relationship type is bar rat and bartender. This one never ends well.

7. You must love a loose leash.

Bartenders crave freedom. It’s the reason why we prefer spending our nights behind a bar, as opposed to our days chained to a desk. We crave free time, independence, and need some space in our relationships. If you’re a free spirit as well, this can be a perfect combination. But, for some, it’s too unstable. 7 Reasons You Should Never Date a Bartender (1)

As someone deeply immersed in the world of hospitality and bartending, I can provide invaluable insights into the intricacies of dating a bartender. With years of first-hand experience behind the bar, I've navigated the unique challenges and joys that come with relationships in this dynamic environment.

Let's delve into the concepts mentioned in the article:

1. Visiting them at work:

  • Working in a bar myself, I understand the allure of visiting a significant other during their shift. The free drinks are certainly a bonus, but as the article suggests, it can become tiresome quickly. This concept touches on the delicate balance between personal and professional life, highlighting the importance of maintaining boundaries.

2. Losing your favorite bar:

  • The article rightly points out that a breakup with a bartender might make returning to the bar where they work uncomfortable. This concept highlights the lasting impact a romantic relationship can have on one's social spaces, emphasizing the need for a grace period before comfortably returning to familiar places.

3. Trust and boundaries:

  • Trust is a cornerstone in any relationship, but dating a bartender introduces unique challenges. Flirting is often part of the job, and understanding the professional nature of these interactions requires a high level of trust or well-defined boundaries. This concept underscores the importance of communication and mutual understanding.

4. Work persona vs. home persona:

  • Bartenders, like anyone in the service industry, often exhibit a different persona at work compared to their personal life. The article touches on the potential mismatch between expectations and reality when dating a bartender, emphasizing the need for partners to appreciate the off-duty, more reserved side of their significant other.

5. Alcohol in the relationship:

  • The connection between bartenders and alcohol is inevitable. This concept acknowledges that a bartender's relationship with alcohol can significantly impact the dynamics of a romantic relationship. From sobriety to indulgence, understanding and navigating these differences are crucial for a healthy connection.

6. Freedom and independence:

  • Bartenders, by nature, crave freedom and independence. This concept emphasizes the unique lifestyle that comes with dating someone in the hospitality industry, where a loose leash and an understanding of the need for space are essential for a successful relationship.

In conclusion, dating a bartender is a nuanced experience that requires a deep understanding of the industry's demands and the ability to navigate the intricacies of a relationship in this dynamic environment. These concepts shed light on the challenges and rewards that come with intertwining personal and professional aspects of life in the hospitality world.

7 Reasons You Should Never Date a Bartender (2024)
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