Do I Need a Sponsor in AA? | Alcoholics Anonymous (2024)

Last Updated: September 11, 2023|Author:Susanne Reed, PhD

If you have chosen Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) to help you get sober, you are not alone. With over 115,000 groups worldwide, the AA program has helped many people experiencing the same challenges you are going through now.¹ According to a 2014 survey, 82% of AA members have a sponsor.¹

There is no one-size-fits-all program for sobriety. Most members have a sponsor, but people can still achieve long-term recovery without one. Knowing the resources available to assist you in your recovery journey can help you decide if having a sponsor will be helpful for you.²

In this article:

The Role of an AA Sponsor
Characteristics of a Beneficial AA Sponsor Relationship
Benefits of Having an AA Sponsor
How to Choose an AA Sponsor

No matter your stage of recovery, encouragement and guidance from people who have successfully maintained sobriety over time is beneficial.

An Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor understands the challenges and potential consequences of alcohol misuse and has accomplished the goal of getting sober. Research shows that most sponsors in AA see themselves as playing specific roles in the recovery of the people they sponsor, including:³

Encouraging the sponsored to work the program of AA
Moving through the 12 steps
Engaging in AA activity
Providing support through regular contact
Carrying the message of AA by sharing their experience

There is no pre-set timeline in which to choose an AA sponsor. Some research shows 75% of new AA members choose a sponsor within the first 90 days of recovery.¹ It’s recommended to attend 90 meetings in your first 90 days of recovery, which can allow you to establish a home group and get to know other members.⁸ This gives you time to assess group members and meet potential sponsors.

Characteristics of a Beneficial AA Sponsor Relationship

As you start meeting and getting to know AA members, you may feel connected to someone by things you have in common.

Do not choose a sponsor solely based on these initial feelings and chemistry. Studies have been conducted to determine the characteristics to look for in a sponsor. The top qualities include the sponsor being personally engaged in Alcoholics Anonymous, trustworthy, and available for contact.⁴

Other important qualities of a sponsor include:⁴

Giving honest feedback
Respecting confidentiality
Having a positive attitude
Having integrity
Having and sharing experiences that speak to your own experience
Offering encouragement, attention, and advice
Being good at solving problems and setting goals

Your Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor is intended to be a peer mentor and should not become your best friend or someone you hang out with in a personal setting. While you do want to connect with a sponsor you enjoy being around, building a strong bond of trust and open, clear communication that can enhance your recovery is the most important quality.⁴

With all relationships in your life, including the one with your AA sponsor, you must set healthy boundaries. Research shows that not setting healthy boundaries leads to setbacks and relapses in recovery.⁵

It’s important to note that building a strong bond of trust with someone and sharing very personal information has risks. You are vulnerable in early recovery. When you find someone you connect with, setting healthy boundaries protects you, your recovery progress, and your work with your sponsor.⁶

One study found potential risks within AA sponsored and sponsor relationships include:⁶

The sponsored may become dependent on the sponsor
The sponsor may misuse sponsorship to gain authority
Both may misuse sponsorship as a counseling role
The sponsor may impose a personally biased AA worldview

You can stop working with an AA sponsor or change sponsors if, at any time, the relationship is no longer serving your recovery. You may decide to change sponsors if you find you do not communicate well, your schedules make it difficult to reach your sponsor, or you find any of the toxic situations listed above developing.

Participating in other treatment modalities, such as one-on-one therapy with a clinician who specializes in alcohol addiction, may help you identify the helpful and potentially harmful characteristics of your sponsor relationship.

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You should also feel free to discuss questions and concerns about choosing a sponsor, setting boundaries, or deciding to change sponsors with senior members of your home AA group, your mental health care team, or a local AA hotline.

Analyses have been performed on the benefits of having a sponsor in AA. Researchers have found that AA members who acquired a sponsor were still abstinent from alcohol after six months and a year of follow-up. Also, more of the members with sponsors had greater meeting attendance at the one-year mark. ⁷

Additionally, researchers found that having an AA sponsor is associated with members having higher rates of:⁷

Working the 12 steps
Seeking the advice of other AA members
Doing AA prescribed service work
Praying, participating in spiritual and mindfulness practices, or otherwise building their relationship with a higher power
Reading aloud at AA meetings
Using the phone to talk with other AA members
Working with other individuals struggling with alcohol addiction
Feeling adequately supported socially and personally

How to Choose an AA Sponsor

Research indicates that the most effective sponsors have experience with and knowledge about AA, are available to the people they sponsor, and strongly invested in goal-setting and maintaining confidentiality. It’s recommended that you consider these traits over gender and age when choosing an Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor, while compatible gender and age may also be important and can narrow your options.⁴

Keep in mind that you are looking for a mentor, not a friend or partner. You want someone who can guide you through each of the 12 Steps. So, it’s essential to choose someone who has spent time working on each step in depth.⁹

One of the main goals of Alcoholics Anonymous, and the use of the 12 Steps, is to allow one person with an alcohol use disorder to help another person with an alcohol use disorder. This part of the program was created because the founder of AA wanted to share the principles that he found critical in maintaining his own sobriety. This sharing became part of what allowed him to stay sober.¹⁰

As you continue in recovery and grow in the AA community, you may also have the opportunity to become a sponsor to someone else who is new to recovery. Becoming a sponsor allows you to give back and help others.¹⁰

If you are interested in learning more about Alcoholics Anonymous, you can find a meeting in our directory. You can learn more about all the treatment options that can help you overcome an alcohol use disorder by calling 800-948-8417Calls are forwarded to paid advertisers today.

Resources

Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. Alcoholics Anonymous 2014 Member Survey.
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (US); Office of the Surgeon General (US). (2016). Chapter 5 – Recovery: The Many Paths to Wellness. Facing Addiction in America: The Surgeon General’s Report on Alcohol, Drugs, and Health [Internet]. Washington (DC): US Department of Health and Human Services.
Whelan, P. J., Marshall, E. J., Ball, D. M., & Humphreys, K. (2009). The role of AA sponsors: a pilot study. Alcohol and Alcoholism, 44(4), 416-22.
Stevens, E. B., & Jason, L. A. (2015). An exploratory investigation of important qualities and characteristics of Alcoholics Anonymous sponsors. Alcoholism Treatment Quarterly, 33(4), 367–384.
Melemis, S. M. (2015). Relapse prevention and the five rules of recovery. The Yale Journal of Biology and Medicine, 88(3), 325–332.
Stevens, E. B., & Jason, L. A. (2015). Evaluating Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor attributes using conjoint analysis. Addictive behaviors, 51, 12-17.
Tonigan, J. S., & Rice, S. L. (2010). Is it beneficial to have an Alcoholics Anonymous sponsor? Psychology of addictive behaviors: journal of the Society of Psychologists in Addictive Behaviors, 24(3), 397–403.
Rynes, K. N., & Tonigan, J. S. (2012). Do social networks explain 12-step sponsorship effects? A prospective lagged mediation analysis. Psychology of addictive behaviors: journal of the Society of Psychologists in Addictive Behaviors, 26(3), 432–439.
Nash, A. J. (2020). The twelve steps and adolescent recovery: a concise review. Substance Abuse: Research and treatment, 14, 1178221820904397.
Gross, M. (2010). Alcoholics Anonymous: still sober after 75 years. American Journal of Public Health, 100(12), 2361–2363.

FAQs

Do I Need a Sponsor in AA? | Alcoholics Anonymous? ›

To join some organizations, you must have a sponsor — a person who vouches for you, presents you as being suitable for membership. This is definitely not the case with A.A. Anyone who has a desire to stop drinking is welcome to join us! In A.A., sponsor and sponsored meet as equals, just as Bill and Dr. Bob did.

Tell Me More ›

Is it mandatory to have a sponsor in AA? ›

Having a sponsor isn't a necessary element of 12-step groups, but having a mentor to guide the process can help facilitate movement through the steps and maintain sobriety. Working through alcohol addiction is never easy, especially when combating it alone.

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What is the point of a sponsor in AA? ›

What does a sponsor do? A sponsor is a senior member of AA or NA who has been in recovery for usually at least a year. Sponsors help you navigate membership, answer questions, work on the 12-steps, and offer accountability. A sponsor is also a confidant who understand where you have been.

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Does the AA Big Book say you have to have a sponsor? ›

Sponsorship becomes a part of the program. Sponsorship wasn't associated with Alcoholics Anonymous in the beginning; in fact, nowhere in the first 164 pages of the Big Book — the section of the A.A. “Bible” that has remained largely unchanged since it was first written — is the word “sponsor” even mentioned.

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How does AA stay anonymous? ›

To maintain their anonymity, members have to be careful not to reveal any identifying information about themselves. This can help them to become more mindful of what they say and do, which can, in turn, help them to be more honest in other areas of their lives.

Get More Info ›

Can you do the 12 steps without a sponsor? ›

Technically, you don't have to get a sponsor, ever! Everything in the 12 step program is voluntary, and you need not feel pressure. That being said, it is not recommended to go without a sponsor for too long. After all, they are the person who takes you through the steps, and that's where the real recovery happens!

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Can a woman sponsor a man in AA? ›

According to The Alcoholism Guide, “You can choose your own AA sponsor if they agree to sponsor you, but AA prefers them to be of the same sex, believing that mixed sex sponsor pairs cause unwanted complications… It is not forbidden to have a sponsor of the opposite sex, but it is not advised.”

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What do sponsors get in return? ›

Sponsors can help you build a prominent reputation within the industry. In exchange for exposure at the Event, they can offer a venue, catering, digital marketing, technology gear, prizes, and so much more.

Keep Reading ›

Is it OK to switch sponsors in AA? ›

Just be sure to have another sponsor, or a few prospective sponsors, in mind before ending things with your current sponsor so you're not left drifting freely in the world of early recovery. Changing sponsors is completely normal, acceptable, and even expected in the world of 12-Step programs.

Learn More Now ›

Can you have two sponsors in AA? ›

Your sponsee may ask if they can have two sponsors. This is generally not recommended in AA; it prevents a sponsee bouncing from sponsor to sponsor until they finally get the feedback information they want to hear.

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What is a sober mentor called? ›

A sober mentor, also known as a sober coach or sober companion, is an experienced professional who provides guidance and support to individuals in recovery from addiction. These mentors have often overcome addiction themselves and are living a sober, healthy lifestyle.

What is the only requirement for AA Big Book? ›

The only requirement for membership is an honest desire to stop drinking. We are not allied with any particular faith, sect or denomination, nor do we oppose anyone.