Q: You buy someone a really great baby shower gift, but she doesn't open the presents at the shower. Do you say something?
A: Opening gifts at a baby shower is less common than it once was. Sometimes the parent-to-be wants to share the gift opening with her partner, or she could be anxious about being the center of attention for an extended period of time. Bottom line, you may not see shower presents opened.
Advertisem*nt
Prior to the event, ask the host how the mom-to-be is handling gift opening. This helps you decide if you want to bring your gift, knowing you won’t see it opened, or give it when you’re alone with the parents.
Ask yourself why you want to see the gift opened. Is it to see the glee on the mom-to-be’s face? Is it to get some sort of recognition, or to show off your gift-giving prowess? Is your gift something you spent a lot of money on or time making? Figuring out your reason behind the desire can help you decide how you want to handle the situation.
Advertisem*nt
— Robin Elise Weiss, pregnancy and parenting expert
A: Recent trends in baby shower events have changed. The typical gift opening tradition has progressed to a “display shower,” where the mom-to-be requests that guests bring an unwrapped gift so the item is displayed during the shower.
This trend is especially popular with larger or co-ed baby showers where gift opening may be overwhelming and time-consuming, resulting in an exhausted mom-to-be and an impatient crowd.
As much as guests would love for the mom-to-be to open their gifts, proper etiquette is respecting her wishes and not asking her to open the presents during the shower. Once one gift is opened, a chain reaction will start and everyone will want theirs opened too.
If you’re wanting that sentimental emotion from the expecting parent, suggest a one-on-one visit either before or after the baby is born and present your gift then. This is a great opportunity for quality time and meeting their new bundle of joy!
— Katherine Kommer, owner of Baby Showers Inc.
chrjohnson@chicagotribune.com
Twitter @christenadot_
[Social Graces archive: Life advice for awkward situations]
[Neighbors' newborn keeping you up at night? Here's what to say to the parents]
[What do you say when your child asks you the meaning of a sexual word?]
