Photo by Karolina Grabowska/Pexels
Doctors say a lot of us are showering more than we need to.
A few times in recent years, celebrities and social media influencers alike have made waves by sharing that they don't make their kids bathe every day. For some parents, that was totally par for the course, but for others, letting a child go more than a day without bathing was seen as a travesty.
Doctors have made it clear that kids don't need to bathe daily, with some going so far as to recommend against it when they are young to protect kids' delicate skin.
But what about grownups? Most of us don't take baths regularly as adults, but what's the ideal frequency for showering?
According to a YouGov poll of over 5,700 Americans, just over half of respondents said they shower daily and 11% said they shower twice or more per day. That means two out of three of us are showering at least once a day.
But according to doctors and dermatologists, that's probably overkill for most people. Unless you're doing heavy labor, exercising vigorously, working outdoors or around toxins or otherwise getting excessively dirty or sweaty, a few showers per week is enough for healthy hygiene.
In fact, Robert H. Shmerling, MD of Harvard Health says too frequent showering could actually have some negative effects on your health.
"Normal, healthy skin maintains a layer of oil and a balance of 'good' bacteria and other microorganisms," Dr. Shmerling writes. "Washing and scrubbing removes these, especially if the water is hot." He shares that removing that protective layer can make our skin dry, irritated or itchy, which can lead to damage that allows allergens and bacteria to cross the skin barrier. Additionally, our immune systems require exposure to microorganisms, dirt, and other environmental stimuli in order to create "immune memory," and if we wash them away too frequently, we might be inhibiting the effectiveness of our immune system.
Dermatologists who spoke to Vogue had similar advice about shower frequency. Board-certified dermatologist Deanne Robinson, MD, FAAD told the magazine that you can skip showering for the day if you haven't engaged in rigorous activity. Mamina Turegano, a triple board-certified dermatologist, internist and dermatopathologist. agreed. "I think that showering three to four times a week is plenty for most people,” she said.
Of course, everyone is different and what is good for one person's skin isn't good for another's. Showering frequency and health also depend on what kinds of products you're using, what temperature of water you're using and how long your shower is. There's a big difference between a quick pits-and-privates rinse-off and a long, hot shower.
While scorching yourself and steaming up the bathroom may feel luxurious and relaxing, especially if you've got sore muscles, dermatologists say it's not good for your skin. Hot showers are especially problematic for people with skin issues like eczema.
"Any skin condition characterized by a defective skin barrier can be worsened by a hot shower," board-certified New York City dermatologist Shari Marchbeintold Allure. "[It] strips the skin of sebum, the healthy fats and oils necessary for skin health, and dehydrates the skin."
In fact most dermatologists recommend keeping showers lukewarm. That sounds like torture, frankly, but who's going to argue with the experts?
A lot of people, actually. Modern humans are pretty particular about our shower preferences, and judging from the comments on cleanliness discussions, some folks are dead set on the idea that a daily shower is simply not negotiable. Even with the experts weighing in with their knowledge and science, a lot of people will continue to do what they do, advice be damned.
But at least the folks who've been judged harshly by the daily shower police have some official backup. As long as you're showering every couple of days, you're golden. As it turns out, there really is such a thing as being too clean.
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Family
Mother of four shares why she showers with her kids, sparking a debate among parents
How old is too old to bathe with children?
Heather Wake
03.09.24
Representative Image from Canva
A mom of four sparked a debate after sharing that she still showers with her kids.
Seems like few things take up more debates than showers these days. When to do it, how often to do it, which snacks are best while doing it (yes, that last one is real).
But when you add parenting into the mix, there’s even more potential for controversy.
Take for instance, Australia-based mom of four, Bronte Towns, who recently went viral after sharing why she showers with her children, all of whom are under seven years old.
In her video’s caption, Towns explained that she was a proponent of family showering because it’s a “natural way” to teach her kids about their own bodies, as well as “bodily autonomy, personal boundaries & consent.”
For one thing, Towns says that the “safe environment” of the shared shower invites her children to ask “innocent, curious questions” they might not otherwise feel comfortable asking.
“So many questions pop up naturally when you shower together. We normalize open conversations in the shower, there’s no silly questions, nothing too awkward to ask, etc.,” she wrote.
Plus, it gives her the opportunity to “role model & monitor body hygiene practices,” along with offering a view of a normal, everyday body, rather than the “stigmatised version most of our kids see all over advertising or online,” she added.
Though Town never specified which of her children she shared showers with (a seemingly intentional move, as it was also written in her caption), some viewers shared concerns over whether or not this was age appropriate behavior, especially for her eldest son.
“Your son is way too old to be seeing you naked,” one viewer wrote.
Others seem to take umbrage with Town’s opinion, regardless of which kid she may or may not be showering with."
"Nope…totally inappropriate."
“You can have literally all these conversations without taking a shower with your kids.”
“I’m sorry but this is very strange once the child is past the age of like 3 or 4.”
“Some things are just meant to be private. No one, and I mean NO ONE outside the walls of your home needed to know this. The amount of oversharing is insane & inappropriate.”
“I’m so glad I never saw my mom naked 🤮 that would have made for a very awkward disturbing relationship. I would never ever ever want to see either of my parents naked, nor would I want my 2 daughters to see me naked. Please don’t normalize this.”
Still, others found this completely normal. Healthy, even. One person commented, “I showered with my mom growing up and was often in the same room as she changed up until I was a teen, I never had the thought of it being ‘weird’ or ‘gross’ until I saw post like these with people being judgmental in the comments, it’s so normal! and knowing what cellulite, stretch marks and sagging skin looked like at a young age made me feel so much more comfortable in my body when I started to see these things. Mom had this and she’s still beautiful and so am I!”
Another added, “My daughter is almost two and takes a shower with Dad almost every night since she was a newborn. Gives mom a break and it’s a great bonding experience. When will we stop? When our daughter wants to.”
It’s worth noting that attitudes about nudity differ among cultures. For example, it’s completely customary in Finland for families to go to the sauna together, naked. For many Finnish families, it’s a Christmas Eve tradition. In Germany, there are not only nude beaches, but nude, or “naturist,” parks. Even in Asia, where views about nudity tend to lean more conservative, Thailand has nude hotels. So it’s worth noting that being unable to separate nudity from sexuality is in some aspects purely an American characteristic, forged by centuries of puritanism.
But still, challenges of Western society aside, there are notable boundaries that parents should probably stick to. So what do the experts have to say about it?
In an interview with Fatherly, Dr. Richard Beyer, a licensed psychologist in Arcadia, California, said that the”general rule of thumb” would be when they reach school age, or around 5 or 6 years old.
Dr. Wendy Lane, a child abuse pediatrician at the University of Maryland Children’s Hospital, added that children will will most likely naturally transition, and, in the name of respecting boundaries parents “should always stop if the child asks to stop.” Basically, if they’re uncomfortable, don’t force them. Also a good general rule of thumb.
Parents may not all stand behind Towns' relaxed rules around nudity, but it’s hard not to agree that teaching kids consent, autonomy and boundaries is important.
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Education
Van Gogh saw something it took scientists another 100 years to see.
Upworthy Staff
03.08.24
Image from Wikimedia Commons.
Van Gogh’s Starry Night.
Van Gogh never got to enjoy his own historic success as an artist (even though we've been able to imagine what that moment might have looked like). But it turns out that those of us who have appreciated his work have been missing out on some critical details for more than 100 years.
I'm not easily impressed, OK?
I know Van Gogh was a genius. If the point of this were "Van Gogh was a mad genius," I would not be sharing this with you.
But I found this and I thought, "Oh, what a vaguely interesting thing." And then I got to the part about the Hubble Space Telescope, and, let me tell you: Mind. Blown.
We've got the set up here, but you have to watch the video for the full effect. It's all the way at the bottom.
Get this: Van Gogh was a pretty cool artist (duh), but as it turns out...
What’s the truth behind when you take off an ear?
...he was also A SCIENTIST!*
*Pretty much.
Here's the story.
While Van Gogh was in an asylum in France, after he mutilated his ear during a psychotic episode*...
(*Or, and I'd like to thank the entire Internet for pointing this out, there's a theory that his friend Paul Gauguin actually cut off his ear, in a drunken sword fight, in the dark. The more you know!)
Animated a thinking one-eared Van Gogh.
All Van Gogh GIFs via TED-Ed.
...he was able to capture one of science's most elusive concepts:
~~~TURBULENCE~~~
Turbulence expressed through art.
Although it's hard to understand with math (like, REALLY HARD), it turns out that art makes it easy to depict how it LOOKS.
So what is turbulence?
Turbulence, or turbulent flow, is a concept of fluid dynamics where fluid movements are "self-similar" when there's an energy cascade — so basically, big eddies make smaller eddies, and those make even smaller ones ... and so on and so forth.
It looks like this:
Pictures explain science.
See? It's easier to look at pictures to understand it.
Thing is, scientists are pretty much *just* starting to figure this stuff out.
Animation of referencing art to science.
Then you've got Van Gogh, 100 years earlier, in his asylum, with a mutilated ear, who totally nailed it!
Science studying Van Gogh.
The folks who noticed Van Gogh's ability to capture turbulence checked to see whether other artists did the same. Most impressionists achieved " luminance" with their art (which is the sort-of *pulsing* you see when you look at their paintings that really shows what light looks like).
But did other artists depict turbulence the way Van Gogh did?
NOPE.
Capturing concepts of nature.
Even in his darkest time, Van Gogh was able to capture — eerily accurately — one of nature's most complex and confusing concepts ... 100 years before scientists had the technology to observe actual star turbulence and realize its similarity to fluid turbulence mathematics as well as Van Gogh's swirling sky. Cool, huh?
Watch the video below to learn even more:
This article originally appeared on 11.14.24
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Pop Culture
It's all about perspective.
Tod Perry
03.08.24
A woman on a shopping spree.
One of the interesting quirks about wealth and class in America is that many people have a hard time determining their socioeconomic status accurately. A poll published by Business Insider found that some Americans earning less than $50,000 feel rich, while others earning more than $100,000 feel poor. Nearly half of Americans earning $100,000 or more identify as middle class.
The same poll found that only 13% of millionaires believe they are wealthy and 60% define themselves as middle class.
A TikTokker named Geneviève explained how this disconnect could happen by using her girlfriend as an example. Geneviève grew up in a low-income family and her girlfriend was raised by affluent parents, with a live-in nanny and a maid. However, the girlfriend always thought she was middle class.
Interestingly, she tells the story in a very non-judgmental way. She simply wants to understand why people’s perceptions of wealth can be so skewed.
“Here are some culture shocks that I had as someone who grew up poor who’s now living with someone who grew up with money,” Geneviève said. “Firstly, is the fact that rich people don’t consider themselves rich because they surround themselves with people who are much richer than them.”
@gen_laforce do y'all have any rich people experiences? i'm curious✨ #richvspoor #cultureshock #grwm #relatable
“It’s amazing that she was able to live this life, but it made me realize that everything is relative. Because although per my standard that qualifies as rich, she was by far not the richest person at her school, in her neighborhood, in her group of friends,” Geneviève said.
“So to her, she was actually middle class because she had never really come into contact with people who were properly poor, or even properly middle class,” she continued. “She had only ever really been exposed to people within her own community who were well-off until she went to college.”
Geneviève’s story is an interesting lesson on how we see ourselves and that, in the end, there’s always going to be someone richer than you and always someone who has less. The key is that if you’re genuinely grateful for what you have, you can feel like a king, regardless of what’s in your bank account. But if you’re rich and ungrateful, you’ll never have enough.
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Family
Mom points out an unspoken, 'unfair' part of having kids who play travel ball
Families can spend thousands on travel sports leagues.
Tod Perry
03.08.24
via Casey Kelley (used with permission) and Vince Fleming/Unsplash
Casey Kelley shares her thoughts on kids in travel sports.
Parents whose children participate in elite travel ball leagues can spend up to $12,000 annually on fees, equipment, hotel rooms and gas. One mother, Casey Kelley, from Alabama, has spoken out, saying that if parents spend all of that money and time, their children should get to play in games. Kelley's daughter plays on a club volleyball team.
The topic was inspired by a conversation she had with other volleyball parents who agreed that every kid should get a decent amount of playing time.
“I’ll tell you what I think. I think, if you’re paying to be there, so it's not like high school sports, I think everyone should have the opportunity to play because this is a developmental league ... and they’re there to develop and to learn,” she explained in a TikTok video.
“Especially if these parents are paying thousands of dollars for them to be in the league and then traveling, spending money on hotels for their kid to sit there and maybe play a minute or two the whole weekend. I think it’s unfair,” she continued.
@caseyjkelley What do you think? #travelball #clubsport #athlete #kids #mom #question
It's reasonable for Kelley to believe that spending a lot of money and traveling all over the map only to watch your kid play for a few minutes feels pointless. However, a lot of parents disagreed with her in the comments.
"You pay for practice. Playing time is earned," Nathan Sullins wrote.
"Absolutely not. If you want fair playing time you play rec ball. Travel ball playing time is performance based," another user wrote.
But these parents haven’t changed Kelley’s mind.
“I’m not opposed to kids earning their spot or the best kids playing more, but I feel that every kid who makes the team should at least have some playing time,” she told Upworthy. “I know it’s not a popular opinion, but it’s how I currently see it.”
Kelley further explained the story in a follow-up video.
@caseyjkelley Clarification post and the last one on this topic #travelball #athlete #travelballparents #clubsport #parenting
What do you think?
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Identity
People can't stop crying after hearing about his mom's love.
Jacalyn Wetzel
03.08.24
Trans man tells beautiful story about his mom.
Being transgender is not an easy thing. No one wakes up one day and decides they want to try on the opposite gender and by the next week they've completely transitioned. Trans people often explain that they realized they were assigned the wrong gender in early childhood but didn't have the language for what was happening until they were older.
Once they've come to terms with who they are and share it with others, they can lose friends, become isolated from family members, and sometimes lose their livelihood. Coming out as transgender even in today's more culturally aware world is not for the weak because it may suddenly feel like the weight of the world is upon you while you simultaneously have dwindling support.
In one man's story, he explains that one of his biggest fears was losing his mom's love, but instead she turned into his most supportive advocate.
"When I was 15, I sat my mother down and I said, 'Mommy, I got something to tell you,' and she said, 'Aww sh*t.' And I said, 'Ma, I'm gay," Milan reveals.
He says his mom quickly became his fiercest ally but wanted to know why he dressed so "mannish," inquiring why Milan, (who still hadn't come out as trans at the time) couldn't be softer like Ellen DeGeneres.
"Now as a transgender person, what we know is that we may lose everybody that we thought loved us and I was scared that I was going to lose her," Milan says before revealing that he eventually told his mom he was a man.
The day of his top surgery his mom showed up. There was no anger or disappointment in her child, just love and grief. Milan explains that his mother felt as if her daughter died in that moment, acknowledging that he wasn't the only one experiencing a transition. The story continues to unfold with deep joy and gratitude that causes commenters to cry.
Milan's story will be featured in Moth Stories anthology "A Point of Beauty," which can be pre-ordered here. But you can watch Milan's heartwarming video below (brief profanity heads-up):
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