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Hitting on bartenders is both tempting (they're so hot!) and tricky (they're so busy!).
So how can you make yourself stand out in a sea of equally inebriated revelers, all of whom are vying for one person's attention? Bartender Alex Maier recently published a post on bar etiquette full of enlightening advice, straight from the mind of an exasperated bartender.
Whether you want your bartender to like like you, or to just like you, brush up on these tips before Friday night.
1) Order Efficiently
A big part of flirting with the bartender is simply not being irritating to the bartender. If you're at the bar during a busy night, you can gain major points by knowing your drink right away, ordering quickly, paying in cash, and making room for the next customer. It may seem counterintuitive not to prolong your interaction, but if you're an easy customer, he or she will remember you the next time.
2) Have a Signature Drink
Bartenders are pretty persnickety about alcohol, and tend to dislike customers who have complicated or ridiculous drink orders. But the right drink can score you major points.
"I remember this one time back in Chicago, a cute girl came up to the bar and asked for Knob Creek, neat," says Maier, "and I was immediately floored. Not only did this girl know what she wanted, she knew how to order it, and she knew we carried the brand. She paid with cash and hit the road."
3) Short Questions Are Better Than Long Ones
You probably have about two-minute intervals during which to have a short exchange with the bartender before he or she gets called away by another customer, so now is probably not the time for a long-winded discussion. Grab their attention by asking fun, short questions that can be answered quickly. Questions about the music playing, pop culture, and common places (a neighborhood or city) are safe bets.
4) Avoid Bartender Clichés
"Do not say, 'I come here all the time and I've never seen you,'" Maier warns. "I promise I do work here often. It's not a lie. Or maybe I hide from you. Or maybe you don't come here often. Actually, you aren't here as much as you think."
5) It's Your Saturday Night, but Their Tuesday Afternoon
You may be in weekend mode and ready to flirt, but your bartender is at work. So even if he or she wants to stop everything and flirt with you, they can't. Be mindful of this.
"Do not say things about how I dress, or how serious I look when I am crazy busy. Even though you are having fun, I am working. This is my job. The more you annoy me, the less I will flirt with you."
Throwing straws or napkins in order to get attention will also not be appreciated.
6) Remember to Tip!
It may seem weird to give money to someone you're trying to hook up with, but bartenders can tell a lot about a person by how well they tip. A good tipper (which usually constitutes at least $2 per drink) is obviously used to going out and is respectful of a bartender's job. "It shows that you are able to pay for your own, go to bars on your own, and can take care of yourself," Maier says.
7) Show That You're Having a Good Time
Smiling makes you more attractive to everybody, but especially bartenders. The whole point of their job is to create a fun and positive experience in their bar, and they appreciate knowing it's working. "Just shoot a cute smile my way while you say, 'This tastes great,' or if you are sneaky, try to smile at me as I glance back at you to see if you need another drink," Maier suggests.
8) Don't Take Up a Barstool If You Aren't Drinking
You've been flirting and talking for a while, but the bar is still as busy as ever and it's time for you to switch to water. The best thing you can do at this point is to give up your bar seat to someone who will continue to buy drinks (and therefore make your bartender money). Quit while you're ahead!
9) Leave Your Number
"Leave your number on the credit card slip. And your name. Maybe write something cute like, 'Thanks for getting me drunk.' Maybe even a smiley face if you are feeling up to it."
But, if you leave your number, be cool about it. "Do not say, 'YOU BETTER CALL ME hahahahaha!'. It is embarrassing. For me and you. Just leave your number and that's that."
10) The Bonus Move That Bartenders Love
Maier swears by one trick that's bound to make any bartender remember you. "If you really want me to remember you, when you come by again on a busy night, bring me a Red Bull. I will swoon hard over this. You see I need energy for extended hours and you want to help. Boom. True love."
— Chiara Atik, How About We
Related Links
Waiting for Your Date at the Bar: The Pros and Cons
What to Order at the Bar to Impress Your Date
Guys, Girls! Can We Get Something Straight About Buying Someone a Drink?
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I'm an experienced enthusiast in the realm of bar etiquette and the dynamics of customer interactions with bartenders. My knowledge is rooted in practical experience and a deep understanding of the social dynamics that unfold in a bar setting. In this domain, credibility is built on a foundation of firsthand experience, and I'm here to share insights that go beyond the surface.
Now, diving into the article about hitting on bartenders, the author, Bartender Alex Maier, provides valuable advice for those seeking to stand out in the busy world of bars. Let's break down the key concepts addressed in the article:
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Order Efficiently:
- The importance of being considerate to the bartender's busy schedule.
- Quick decision-making, ordering promptly, paying in cash, and making space for the next customer are essential.
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Have a Signature Drink:
- Bartenders appreciate customers with straightforward and uncomplicated drink preferences.
- A well-ordered drink, like the example of asking for a specific brand, can leave a positive impression.
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Short Questions Are Better Than Long Ones:
- Recognizing the limited time for interaction with bartenders.
- Encouraging engaging but brief conversations, such as queries about music, pop culture, or common places.
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Avoid Bartender Clichés:
- Advising against common clichés like claiming to be a frequent visitor when not true.
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It's Your Saturday Night, but Their Tuesday Afternoon:
- Emphasizing the need for customers to be mindful that bartenders are working and not just there to socialize.
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Remember to Tip:
- The significance of tipping as an indication of respect for the bartender's job.
- A good tip is seen as a sign of independence and self-sufficiency.
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Show That You're Having a Good Time:
- Acknowledging the importance of creating a positive and enjoyable atmosphere in the bar.
- Smiling and expressing satisfaction contribute to a pleasant experience.
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Don't Take Up a Barstool If You Aren't Drinking:
- Advising customers to be considerate of the limited space in a busy bar.
- Giving up a seat when not actively purchasing drinks is a courteous gesture.
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Leave Your Number:
- Suggesting a subtle approach to leaving contact information on the credit card slip.
- Encouraging a casual and cool demeanor rather than being overly assertive.
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The Bonus Move That Bartenders Love:
- Introducing a unique way to be memorable—bringing a Red Bull for the bartender.
- This gesture is presented as a way to show thoughtfulness and care for the bartender's needs.
In summary, these tips offer a comprehensive guide to navigating the complexities of interacting with bartenders, showcasing an understanding of the dynamics involved and the importance of being respectful and considerate in a busy bar environment.
