Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (2024)


To reduce the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) the safest place for a baby to sleep is in their own clear, flat, separate sleep space, such as a cot or Moses basket. However, we know that many parents find themselves co-sleeping whether they mean to or not. Wherever you’re planning for your baby to sleep we recommend making your bed a safer place for baby. Our advice on co-sleeping with your baby will tell you how.

When not to co-sleep

Whether you choose to co-sleep or it is unplanned, there are some key risks you should avoid.

Co-sleeping with your baby is very dangerous if:

  • you or anyone in the bed has recently drunk any alcohol
  • you or anyone in the bed smokes or the baby was exposed to smoking in pregnancy
  • you or anyone in the bed has taken any drugs or medication that make you feel sleepy
  • your baby was born prematurely (before 37 weeks of pregnancy) or weighed under 2.5kg or 5½ lbs when they were born.

In these scenarios, it is always best to put baby in their own safe sleep space, such as a cot or Moses basket. Keeping the cot or Moses basket next to your bed might make this easier.

Never fall asleep on a sofa or armchair with your baby. The risk of SIDS is 50 times higher for babies when they sleep on a sofa or armchair with an adult. They are also at risk of accidental death as they can easily slip into a position where they are trapped and can’t breathe.

Co-sleeping more safely

Adult beds have not been designed or safety tested for infant sleep in the same way as, for example, a cot or Moses basket. Whether you choose to bedshare, or it is unplanned, it is best to think ahead.

  • Keep pillows and adult bedding away from your baby or any other items that could cover their head or cause them to overheat. A high proportion of babies who die as a result of SIDS are found with their head covered by loose bedding.
  • Remove slatted / decorated headboards, or cover them so there are no gaps.
  • Follow all The Lullaby Trust’s other safer sleep advice to reduce the risk of SIDS such as sleeping baby on their back.
  • Do not bring other children or pets into bed with you. This will help to reduce the risk of accidents.
  • Check that baby cannot be trapped in the bedframe or headboard, wedged or fall out of bed or get trapped between the mattress and the wall.
  • Never leave your baby alone in an adult bed. It’s important to consider any risks that an adult bed may post to your baby, especially while you are asleep. As your baby develops, becomes more mobile and can move around, the risks can change, so we recommend checking your bed regularly to prevent possible accidents.

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (1)

If you are bedsharing with your baby you should consider any risks before every sleep. It is easy for your situation to change if you are unwell or have drunk any alcohol, which means your baby will be safest in a separate sleep space such as a cot or Moses basket on that occasion.

For more info on co-sleeping and safer sleep read our guide for parents

Sharing a room

Babies should always be in the same room as you for at least the first six months for sleep, day and night. This doesn’t mean you can’t leave the room to make a cup of tea or go to the toilet, but for most of the time when they are sleeping they are safest if you are close by.

There are no devices on the market that will substitute a parent or carer being in the same room as baby for safer sleep.

Co-sleeping definitions

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (2)Room sharing| When a baby sleeps in their parent(s) or carer in their own separate sleeping space such as a cot or Moses basket.

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (3)Bed sharing | When a babyshares the same bed with an adultfor most of the night, and not just to be comforted or fed. Some parents also choose to sleep with their baby in other places.

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (4)Sofa sharing| When a parent or carer sleeps on a sofa or armchair with a baby (remember – this is dangerous)

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (5)Co-sleeping| When parents or carers sleep on a bed, a sofa or a chair with a baby

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (6)

Co-sleeping with your baby: FAQs

I am worried I might fall asleep while I breastfeed my baby at night, is this ok?

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Breastfeeding reduces the chance of SIDS. If you feel you might fall asleep we would recommend you prepare the bed as described above so it is safer for baby if this happens.

Make sure you know the advice on when never to co-sleep so you know when to take particular care. It is really important that you do not accidentally fall asleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair. If you think you might fall asleep on a sofa or armchair, put the baby down in a safe place to sleep.

Should I co-sleep with my baby?

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The safest place for a baby is their own separate sleep space, such as a cot or Moses basket. We would just advise you to read all the information on co-sleeping and how to reduce the risks, so you can make an informed decision for you and your baby.

However, there are some circ*mstances where we would strongly recommend against co-sleeping such as on a sofa or armchair, if anyone in the bed smokes or has drunk alcohol or your baby was premature or a low birth weight.

Can I co-sleep with twins or multiples?

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If you choose to bedshare with twins or multiples we would advise not to bedshare with more than one baby at a time due to risk of accidents associated with bedsharing with more than one baby or child.

Is it safer to co-sleep using a nest or pod than with a baby just lying on the adult bed?

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No. We do not recommend that babies sleep on soft surfaces such as pods or nests. If you choose to co-sleep with your baby the safest place is a clear space on a firm flat mattress the same as we would advise with a cot.

Why do you advise against co-sleeping in certain scenarios?

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It is estimated that around half of SIDS deaths occur whilst co-sleeping, and that most of these are in high risk situations. We do not know the cause of SIDS and why these deaths happen but we do know what some of the risk factors are and that removing those risks greatly lowers the chance of SIDS occurring.

For that reason we strongly advise against co-sleeping when there are risk factors such as a baby being premature or a parent having drunk alcohol.

What bedding should I use for my baby when we co-sleep?

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Adult bedding should be kept well away from your baby along with any belts or cords from clothing. Keep adult bedding at your waist height and add an extra layer of clothing if you are cold

A baby sleeping bag is a good way of giving your baby their own bedding when bedsharing.

Baby sleeping bags should be well fitted, so the baby can’t wriggle down inside. Most sleeping bags are fitted according to a baby’s weight, rather than age.

The Lullaby Trust has worked with Public Heath England, Unicef UK Baby Friendly and Basis on two publications to support families with safer sleep advice and advice on co-sleeping more safely. We have also collaborated on a guide for health professionals to have more open and productive discussions with families about safer sleep and co-sleeping. These can be downloaded below.

You might also be interested in reading the two Unicef Baby Friendly publications, which are both endorsed by The Lullaby Trust:

Co-sleeping - The Lullaby Trust (2024)

FAQs

At what age is cosleeping inappropriate? ›

Dr. Rebecca Fisk, a pediatrician at Lenox Hill Hospital at Northwell Health in New York City, warns that babies under the age of 12 months should absolutely not co-sleep as bed-sharing increases the risk of suffocation and Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS). “Co-sleeping is a personal decision, not a medical decision.

Is it safe for a baby to sleep in a co-sleeper? ›

Co-sleeping may also help the mother to sync sleep cycles with her baby. Although some parents see benefits to co-sleeping with their child, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) does not recommend it. It's much safer for your infant or toddler to sleep alone in their own bed.

Is co-sleeping allowed now? ›

The safest place for a young baby to sleep for the first six months of its life is in a cot, rather than the same bed as their parents. Whilst this remains the advice from the NHS, its guidance has now been updated to acknowledge that bedsharing may sometimes take place, and what people can do to make it safer.

What is the safest co-sleeping position? ›

In terms of the safest positioning for co-sleeping, the “C” position is a popular choice. This is where you lie on your side facing your baby with your lower arm above their head so that your body curls around them. Your knees should be positioned under your baby's feet.

Is it OK for a 7 year old to sleep with parents? ›

Co-sleeping is not recommended, but a 7-year-old child sleeping with parents is considered normal in many families and cultures. The American Association of Pediatrics (AAP) warns against co-sleeping at any age, especially if the infant is younger than four months.

Is it OK for a 12 year old to sleep with mom? ›

Clearly, you and your son are close and he still relies on you a great deal, especially at bedtime. It's OK to carve out time for pre-bedtime cuddles and even to let him climb into bed with you in case of a nightmare, but at this point, nightly bed sharing should definitely be phased out.

In what states is it illegal to cosleep? ›

The illegal act? Co-sleeping. Co-sleeping has been a heated debate for years — with some people swearing by it, and others believing it's unsafe. And now prosecutors in Indiana, Utah, Delaware, and Texas are involving themselves in the topic by making co-sleeping punishable by law.

Why is co-sleeping not recommended? ›

Bed-sharing increases the chance of suffocation, strangulation, and SIDS. An adult bed has many safety risks for a baby, including: suffocation from a soft mattress, memory foam, waterbed, or loose or soft bedding such as pillows, blankets, or quilts.

Why does SIDS peak at 2-4 months? ›

Why Does SIDS Peak at 2-4 Months? The widely accepted explanation for the SIDS peak has to do with the timeline of brain development. “Up to 4 months old, the part of the brain that controls breathing and wakefulness is under a lot of development,” Juliet explains.

What is the unhealthiest sleeping position? ›

But Mayo Clinic experts say sleeping on your back is actually the worst sleeping position, especially if you have sleep apnea. "Sleeping on the back means that your tongue and jaw can fall down and crowd your airway. And many people snore more on their back," says Dr. Krahn.

What is the C shape bed sharing? ›

Mothers assume a protective position in the bed – curled around the infant in a 'C' shape, with her arm above the infant's head and her knees drawn up under its feet, she thus protects it from environmental hazards – cold; heat; bedding and bed-partners.

What is the cuddle curl? ›

When a breastfeeding mother sleeps in bed with her baby, she tends to curve her body around her baby in a “cuddle curl” that keeps the infant at breast level and keeps her from rolling onto him.

What age should you stop sharing a bed with your child? ›

Stop Co-Sleeping with Your Baby at Age Two

It is an essential method that is used by most parents to help kids feel less stressed at night. And while there is no question that there are numerous health benefits, it is always best to end co-sleeping by the end of age two at the latest.

Is it okay for a 13 year old to sleep with parents? ›

I have seen first-hand the strong opinions people have about parents co-sleeping (or not) with their children. While we need to be mindful of safety and SIDS when co-sleeping with infants, there is no problem with co-sleeping with older children in and of itself.

What age should a child sleep in their own bed? ›

When Is the Right Time to Switch to a Toddler Bed? Approximately one-third of toddlers transition to a bed between the ages of 18 months and 2 years old, and another third transition between ages 2 and 2.5. In general, most toddlers make the move from a crib to a bed between the age of 18 months and 3 years old.

At what age should you stop cuddling your child to sleep? ›

Transitioning Away from Cuddling to Sleep

Although there is no right or wrong age to stop bedtime cuddles, most experts suggest that it is best to start the process when your child is around 18 months old. At this age, they are developing their sense of independence and starting to recognise bedtime routines.

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