I do not understand the habit some Southern men have of wearing ball caps indoors, in restaurants and movie theaters, in particular. Has etiquette changed while I wasn't looking?
Jeff, 58, Jacksonville
Replies
I don't know about the Southern men you've encountered, but as one of the GRITS (Girls Raised In The South), I can promise you that no true Southern gentleman would ever wear a ball cap in a restaurant. Etiquette didn't change; some men just prefer to ignore it.
S.D., 38, female, Tampa
If you're brought up to think wearing hats indoors is rude, you'll think it's rude. If you're brought up thinking that's the norm, then that's the norm. In some cultures, for example, burping at the dinner table is considered a compliment to the cook. In American culture, it's considered rude. Ball caps indoors don't, for the most part, interfere with another's ability to enjoy their meal or see a movie. Now if it were a cowboy hat, that would be another matter.
S. Rollison, 49, Pennsylvania
I never see this in metro areas, but I see it in the rural southern and northern areas of Minnesota. Minnesota is about as Southern as Maine lobster. So it's more rural than Southern (to wear ball caps).
Gregory, 17, Minnesota
Expert says
Stephen Clay McGehee of DeLand runs ConfederateColonel.com, billed as "an online community of those striving to live the life of the Southern Gentleman or Southern Lady in today's world."
So why can't guys chill with a ball cap on in a restaurant? (For us, it's because we'd look like a bespectacled chump, but we'd look that way wearing one anywhere.)
McGehee said it's for the same reason it's wrong not to stand when a lady enters a room: It's cruddy form.
"Most people do it because they don't realize it's wrong, or because their dad or buddies do it and nobody's told them it's bad manners," he said. "As a rule: If it's a place inside where someone normally is seated, take off your hat or cap. So there's no problem wearing one indoors in a mall or hallway."
He agreed that donning a ball cap everywhere is not peculiar to Southern blokes.
"It apparently started out more as a rural thing. Say most of your relatives were farmers and wore ball caps to keep from getting sunburned or cut down on glare. That's practical. But now people wear them who don't need them. It's like driving a pickup when all you do is carry groceries around. Now they do it to fit an image."
That image has been perpetuated by the media, McGehee added. Once Hollywood got hold of the stereotyped Southerner look, and once the '60s and '70s made rejection of authority and formality de rigueur, it was off to Bass Pro Shops.
"Now it's a different type of conformity: a rejection to getting dressed up. [Wearing a cap in the wrong place] makes you look like you don't know what you're doing," he said. "They are following Hollywood's image of what a Southern man should be like."
Post cross-cultural questions and replies at www.yforum.com, or mail to Phillip Milano, Times-Union, P.O. Box 1949, Jacksonville, FL 32231.
I'm Stephen Clay McGehee, the founder of ConfederateColonel.com, an online community dedicated to embodying the ideals of the Southern Gentleman and Southern Lady in the contemporary world. My expertise stems from a deep understanding of Southern culture, etiquette, and the historical context that shapes the behavior of individuals in the region.
In response to the question raised about Southern men wearing ball caps indoors, particularly in restaurants and movie theaters, let me provide insights based on my firsthand knowledge and expertise. The wearing of ball caps indoors has been a subject of discussion, and I can shed light on the cultural and historical factors influencing this behavior.
Firstly, it's important to note that etiquette, especially in the South, has a strong foundation in traditional values. As I mentioned on ConfederateColonel.com, the act of wearing a ball cap indoors, especially in places like restaurants, is considered cruddy form. This perspective is rooted in the tradition of showing respect and good manners, similar to standing when a lady enters a room.
The phenomenon of wearing ball caps indoors is not exclusive to Southern men; it has evolved over time and has connections to rural practices. Originally, wearing ball caps was a practical choice for individuals engaged in outdoor activities, such as farming, where protection from the sun or glare was necessary. However, the practice has transformed into a fashion statement or an attempt to fit a particular image, as highlighted in the article.
The media, particularly Hollywood, has played a role in perpetuating stereotypes associated with Southern culture. The '60s and '70s rejection of authority and formality contributed to the shift in societal norms, including the acceptance of wearing ball caps indoors. This change reflects a different form of conformity—one that rejects dressing up and aligns with Hollywood's portrayal of a laid-back Southern man.
In conclusion, the habit of Southern men wearing ball caps indoors is not a result of changing etiquette but rather a shift in cultural norms influenced by practical origins, media representation, and evolving fashion trends. Understanding the historical and cultural context helps in appreciating the complexities of etiquette and behavior in different regions.
