Etiquette of the Italian kiss (2024)

Etiquette of the Italian kiss (1)

In Italy, it is a common practice to greet someone with a light kiss on both their cheeks. This is true even if you are just newly acquainted or if you have known someone for quite a long time. At an Italian social event, you can just imagine that half the time is spent kissing people, hello, and the rest of the time kissing everyone goodbye! For folks from Anglo-Saxon countries, where a firm and powerful handshake suffices for both coming and going, this custom is quite endearing. It makes people like me want to pucker up their lips and express themselves as an Italian would.

But, in my exuberance to embrace the culture of kissing, I have found myself in some embarrassing situations like these:

1) Incorrectly anticipating which side to begin a kiss, one ends up bashing noses or butting foreheads

2)Instead of delivering two discrete “air kisses” to an Italian, an American energetically delivers two exuberant kisses where lips actually touch the skin, accompanied by a friendly bear hug(because that’s what we Americans do) and then feels really stupid for overstepping bounds of decorum

Etiquette of the Italian kiss (2)

3) The ballet of swiveling heads, in which both people turn at precisely the same moment and in the same direction, causing mouths to meet and kisses to be planted on lips, instead of cheeks.

To make a good impression, avoid face bumping, breaking someone’s nose, or running the risk of arestraining order, I decidedto do a little investigative reporting to uncover the correct way to conduct a proper Italian greeting. I started off by asking an Italian friend her advice on the matter. I then proceeded to do a little research on the internet, where it was not at all surprising to find that a great deal has already been written about the art of kissing. Ahem.

Etiquette of the Italian kiss (3)

However, in regard to the Italian greeting, I discovered that it is customary to start with the right cheek and then elegantly move to the left cheek. Two “air kisses” will suffice followed by a delicious onomatopoeic “smack”, customary for most women of course, so as to not mess up blush or leave lipstick marks. However, just to make it that much more confusing, if you find yourself in Spain, remember to reverse all that. Apparently, in other Latin countries, they start with the opposite cheek. In the event that you unexpectedly end up receiving three kisses instead of the customary two, consider yourself super lucky because it is believed that three kisses bring good fortune.

“Baciami ancora!”

Find out how Sophia learns to kiss the Italian way in Dreaming Sophia! Things start out a little rocky for her, but eventually, she gets the hang of things and is soon following Marcello’s Mastroianni’sadvice “Baciami ancora!”

Now go out there and kiss a friend! Just remember that practice makes perfect and if you mix up
your rights and your lefts and you end up bopping heads, just give your friend a hug and agree
to turn the other cheek…and start all over again!

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Etiquette of the Italian kiss (2024)
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