Psychology Reveals 7 Traits Of Men Who Like Older Women (2024)

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What is the mindset of straight men who like older women? Conventional wisdom states that men tend to prefer women younger than them. So, it can be surprising to see young men chase after older women. Well, all we can say is that conventional wisdom is not always right.

According to research, the number of younger men going for older women could be as high as 60%. In fact, every teenage boy can tell you about the female professor they had a crush on. To show you how common it is, below is a list of celebrity couples in younger men, older women relationships:

  • Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas: 10-year age gap
  • Lisa Bonet and Jason Momoa: 11-year age gap
  • Shakira and Gerard Piqué: 10-year age gap
  • Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles: 10-year age gap
  • French President Emmanuel Macron and Brigitte Macron: 24-year age gap
  • Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson: 13-year age gap

Now that we know that such men do exist, I am sure that you are curious to get answers to the burning question, “Why do younger men like older women?” By the end of this article, I will have answered the following questions:

  • Why do men find older women appealing?
  • Why am I sexually attracted to an older woman?
  • Is sex better with older women?
  • What kind of man is attracted to an older woman?
  • Can relationships succeed when the woman is older than the man?

Psychology Reveals 7 Traits Of Men Who Like Older Women

Table of Contents

What is it about this younger guy older woman relationships? And why would a man like an older woman? Well, actor Naveen Andrews once said, “Older women know who they are and that makes them more beautiful than the younger ones. I like to see a face with some character. I want to see lines. I want to see wrinkles.”

Due to the way some men talk about women, you would not be wrong to assume that most men prefer dating women who are younger than them. Yet, younger male older female relationships are on the rise, as quite a few men seem to find older women appealing. Indeed, many struggle with the question, “why am I sexually attracted to older woman?”

Let’s delve into the psychology of older woman younger man relationshipby looking at the 9 common characteristics typically found amongst such men.

1. Younger men who date older women have high libido

If you are always wondering “Why am I sexually attracted to older woman?”, well, there can be quite a few reasons:

  • Mature women are sexy
  • You have a high sex drive that can only be satisfied by a more experienced lover
  • Older women tend to be more experienced, open, and versatile in matters of the bedroom

Research shows that older women may be attracted to the sexual stamina of younger men. On the other hand, in younger male older female relationships, the men, who have relatively less sexual experience, believe that a woman with more experience would be more likely to act out their fantasies and even teach them a useful trick or two. Moreover, studies have shown that older women tend to be better at sex than their younger counterparts.

Related Reading: 16 Ways To Show Affection To Your Partner

2. Such men are inclined toward maturity and competence

If you’re still wondering, “Why do younger men like older women?”, well, young men who like dating mature women probably think such women are sexy. Studies show how and why men and women are attracted to maturity, and it is no surprise that maturity comes with age. Men seek partners who have experienced life more than them, and their competence on the personal and professional front attracts them too.

As such, they believe that dating an older woman would increase their chances of finding such a mature partner. There are many reasons that a younger man might be attracted to an emotionally mature older woman. Some of them are:

  • Mature women know what they want to do with their lives and aren’t as anxious as young women due to their self-possession
  • An older woman is fun because there is less relationship drama born out of jealousy
  • Women of that age are more dependable and competent
  • A mature woman can teach a younger man a few things about the world

3. Some younger men are interested in a stable life

Why would a man like an older woman? Well, studies indicate that one reason for younger male older female relationshipsis that these men are more interested in stable, homely, and family-centric relationships. And, it doesn’t hurt that mature women are sexy. Such men are not really interested in casual dating, spending days in a dance club, or living life one day at a time. Such a man is probably looking for a serious relationship, one in which he and his partner can focus on growing their lives together. Such younger men believe that an older woman has a higher chance of feeling the same way they do.

On older women and dating them, this Reddit user says; “They know who they are, what they want, and aren’t looking for someone to be their dad or take care of them.”

4. Most men who like older women are secure about their masculinity

As surprising as it may sound, research indicates that men who find older women appealing are highly supportive of the women’s actions and goals and are not afraid to flip the traditional gender roles. These men are usually mature enough to be aware of the fact that they are dating individuals who have their own likes, interests, goals, and ambitions. They do not view their partners as people who exist solely to fulfill their needs.

When it comes to dating older women, men understand that such women have been working toward achieving their goals for a long time. They even understand that their older partners may be more knowledgeable than them. These secure men have absolutely no issues in trusting their partners’ judgment and do their best to be supportive.

Psychology Reveals 7 Traits Of Men Who Like Older Women (1)

5. They are more introverted

It can be said that men with higher degrees of introversion are more likely to get into a younger guy older woman relationship. You may be confused as to why an introverted man would be attracted to an older woman, but it is actually quite obvious once you understand how an introvert thinks. A study shares a few traits of an introvert and what they like:

  • They prefer personal and deep conversation topics
  • They prefer a quiet night in
  • They have a low threshold for tolerating drama

If you have been paying attention to this article, it’s easy to see the psychology of older woman younger man relationship by now, but our list is not complete yet.

Related Reading: The 5 Types Of Love Languages And How To Use Them For Happy Relationships

6. Younger men who date older women are open-minded

It might be surprising to hear, but research indicates that men who are sexually attracted to older women are far more open-minded than usual. It is no secret that dating an older woman is seen as a taboo in most cultures. An old, attractive woman dating younger men is referred to as a ‘cougar’, often in a derogatory manner, and such women are often shamed for not dating men older than them. Yet, the young men who are attracted to older women may find this line of thinking archaic, misogynistic, and repulsive.

Young men who like older women are called ‘cubs’, but quite frankly, they do not care about these labels. My friend Joe says, “I find an older woman fun and I don’t care how people view my relationship. I can focus all my romantic energy on my partner, regardless of the stigma surrounding it.”

7. Some of them are low on self-esteem and seek validation

The psychology of older woman younger man relationship may really be simple. The reason that men like dating an old attractive woman may come from a sense of accomplishment. Studies have found that men tend to feel better about themselves when an older woman shows them all the female body language signs of attraction. Psychologist Milaine Alarie famously said, “They’re the ones chasing the cougar.”

Now, this is not to say that every man who dates an old attractive woman is looking for an ego boost. Some may find an older woman fun and nice to be with. It doesn’t hurt if she is a successful woman to boot. In fact, as we can see above, there are quite a few young men who like older women and will date them without thinking they are gaining an upper hand or getting their ego and societal norms involved.

8. Such men value the financial independence of older women

Men who like dating older women love the fact that such women, due to the age factor, are financially stable. The fact that such a a woman can take care of herself makes her very attractive to them. So, this is what men love about such women:

  • Stability and security: They have resources to not only support themselves but to contribute to the relationship as well
  • Freedom and autonomy: Older women can travel, pursue their long-term interests, and move without depending on their partners for money
  • Career accomplishment: Old, attractive women may have successful careers due to their ambition, drive, and work ethic

Related Reading: The 13 Best Tips For Dating In the Middle Age

9. They like the life experiences of older women

I asked Joe, the friend I mentioned above, “Why do younger men like more mature women?” His response was, “I find dating an older woman fun because of the life experiences she may have gathered.” So, you see, they bring in a new level of wisdom and perspective that would be missing in the younger ones. This can be intoxicating and a major factor of attraction to a younger man who may want to learn from the insights their older partners bring to the relationship. Life experiences also contribute to:

  • Wisdom and perspective: Such older women have probably had to face numerous challenges and must’ve learned from them. This gives them a deeper understanding of themselves and the world. Due to their wisdom, they have can hold more meaningful conversations on different things
  • Emotional maturity: Older women have emotional maturity and are devoid of the drama younger ladies bring into relationships. They are too busy concentrating on their daily lives and livelihoods. They also possess emotional stability, which allows them to handle conflict and other life problems better. These factors are critical in a healthy relationship. This Reddit user summarizes it well. “Maturity is a big one. The conversation is more than let’s get drunk and have sex.”
  • Support and guidance: Older women can give their partners better support and guidance due to their experiences
  • Sexual experience: A mature woman is sexy because of her previous sexual experience. She is very much in tune with what she wants and is not in the business of playing games just so a man can like her. What she brings to a sexual relationship can be very satisfying

Key Pointers

  • Men who date older women tend to be more open-minded, secure, and supportive of their partners’ ambitions. They may also have a high sex drive
  • Why do younger men like older women? Such men are attracted to maturity and stability, traits which are commonly found in older women
  • Some men date older women to boost their confidence. Such men probably suffer from low self-worth

The younger guy older woman debate is quite interesting. By now, it should be very clear why some men would gravitate toward older women without reservations about the age difference. Hopefully, this article has helped you understand such men better by providing some insights into their personalities. You might even read this and think that such men possess the perfect characteristics for you to consider dating them.

However, every person is unique. So, not all young men who like dating older women would possess each and every one of these traits. It is quite normal for younger men to like older women. Chances are, if you’re a woman who knows a few younger men, there is a possibility that one of them is attracted to you already.

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Psychology Reveals 7 Traits Of Men Who Like Older Women (2024)

FAQs

What is the psychology of men who like older women? ›

Men who are attracted to older women are often emotionally intelligent and are able to navigate complex emotions and relationships with ease. They are able to empathise with others and are sensitive to their needs and feelings. They can understand emotions very well without being too critical.

Why are men attracted to much older women? ›

"An older woman is more sure of herself and brings that to the relationship. She knows what she wants and how to communicate that to her partner," he said. More than any other advantage, men talked about the positive intimate relationships they experienced.

What is it called when a guy likes older women? ›

A person with such a sexual preference is a gerontophile or gerontosexual.

Why am I sexually attracted to older women in psychology? ›

With age comes self-knowledge, with self-knowledge comes acceptance, comfort, and confidence. Because older women tend to know themselves and the world better than younger folks, they typically exude more confidence and self-assurance. This confidence may also translate to the bedroom.

Can a younger man truly love an older woman? ›

Age should not be a barrier to love and companionship. There is no reason why a relationship between an older woman and younger man cannot work long term, provided both partners are committed and willing to put in the work.

What attracts an older man to a woman? ›

But have people wondered what older men are really attracted to? After a certain age, looks is no longer one of the main priorities but a distant preference. Older men are all about love, trust and security. They hold very important regard for what the future entails for them and their partner.

What age gap is too big? ›

Dating Age Rule. The dating age rule to determining a socially acceptable age difference in partners goes something like this: half your age plus seven (40 = 20 +7 = 27) to define the minimum age of a partner and your age minus seven times two (40 = 33 * 2 = 60) to define the maximum age of a partner.

What are the disadvantages of dating an older woman? ›

If you decide to date an older woman, you may face stigma and unkind looks or statements from others. You may also find double standards in certain relationships. Older men may not face as much stigma about having a younger partner as older women dating a younger partner do.

What percentage of men are attracted to older women? ›

On top of that, according to PR Newswire, among that 60%, 34% of men in their early 20s prefer to date women who are five to 10 years older than them, and that's for four main reasons. - 50% of men over 45 years old preferred women just 1 to 4 years older.

What is an attractive older woman called? ›

The "cougar phenomenon", as it is called, is frequently associated with present-day, glamorous celebrities such as Madonna, Sam Taylor-Johnson and Demi Moore.

What is a 50 year old cougar called? ›

Age 30-39: Puma. Age 40-49: Cougar. Age 50-59: Jaguar. Age 60-68: Panther. Age 69: puss*cat.

Why do I only attract older women? ›

Some psychologists opine that we are often attracted to people with the same personalities and physique as our parents. If you have a great relationship with them, it is very possible that you are instinctively seeking the same kind of love and positive vibes.

Why do guys love older women? ›

Maturity: Men appreciate women who exhibit maturity and can handle situations with rationality. Maturity entails efficient communication and the ability to express thoughts articulately. Self-confidence: Younger men are often attracted to older, confident women.

What is the psychology of being attracted to older people? ›

Some studies suggest that younger people have an evolutionary pull toward older men. Some of this relates to genetics—theoretically, older men have higher status and more resources at their disposal. Because of this, you might be drawn to physical features that signal this status.

Why am I suddenly attracted to older women? ›

Older women, often characterized by their financial independence and emotional maturity, can offer a sense of stability that is highly appealing to some. These women have traversed the complexities of life and have developed a resilience that can be both comforting and inspiring to their partners.

What is a cougar's partner called? ›

The nomenclature has been around for years:— Older woman (cougar) and younger man (cub, toyboy) Older man (sugar daddy) and younger woman (gold digger, jailbait).

Why are older women attracted to younger men? ›

Younger men are more attractive to women

They are more available, more fun, have fewer life problems, and are generally more relaxed than older men. They look at life casually and are not so burdened with worries. Younger men are charming, entertaining, and full of optimism. Women at a certain age need just that.

What is a cougler? ›

an older woman who seeks sexual relationships with much younger men: He's in his twenties, but he prefers cougars in their forties and fifties to young women his own age.

Why do men prefer younger women? ›

Some men see younger women as more playful.

Couples who are fun-loving and have a good sense of humor tend to be better at communication and conflict management. Some men see younger women as friskier, more exuberant, and therefore more adept romantic partners long-term.

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