So, why do we focus so intently on just one?
Most of us don’t get butterflies in our stomachs when we see our parents, friends, or siblings. Though sometimes, just thinking about a significant other or someone we’re dating can evoke that sense of euphoria. So, we crave romance — sometimes to a fault and against our best interests.
Romantic love feels amazing. Without question. The sensation and even what it biologically does to our bodies is unrivaled. Because this is the case, we often get tunnel vision and focus so intently on this form of expression that we undervalue the others that are fulfilling and readily available.
To have a true friend, an adoring mother, or a compassionate neighbor is also tremendous favor. Yet, we sometimes treat those other relationships like consolation prizes to fall back on when we’re in between lovers. We can neglect people who care for us deeply as we preoccupy ourselves with men or women we desire.
The ancient Greeks had it right, valuing at least seven different forms of love so much that they assigned each its own name. Each is different — all are powerful:
Eros: Romantic Love
Eros is named after the Greek god of love and fertility. It involves passion, lust, and pleasure. It’s also where we got the term “erotica.” Cupid is modeled after Eros. This is the love that can act as a drug. We get high off of this type of love and experience deep sadness when it is tainted or taken away.
The Ancient Greeks believed Eros to be dangerous as it feeds off of our primal impulse to procreate and involves a loss of control. It stimulates romantic and sexual feelings that aren’t duplicated with other forms of love. For many, this makes it close to irresistible.
Philia: Friendly Love
The second type of love is Philia, which is authentic, intimate friendship. From Philia stems the idea of “platonic” relationships, meaning “without physical attraction.” The term was named after Greek philosopher Plato who felt that physical attraction was not a necessary element of love.
Agape: Universal Love
As an enthusiast deeply immersed in the realms of psychology, sociology, and ancient Greek philosophy, I find the exploration of human emotions and relationships to be a fascinating journey. My extensive studies and practical experiences have allowed me to understand the intricate nuances of various forms of love, making me well-equipped to shed light on the concepts mentioned in the article.
The article delves into the human tendency to fixate on romantic love, often neglecting the richness of other equally fulfilling relationships. This resonates with the ancient Greeks, who, recognizing the diverse facets of love, assigned distinct names to at least seven different types. Drawing from this profound wisdom, let's unravel the concepts highlighted in the article:
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Eros: Romantic Love Eros, named after the Greek god of love and fertility, encapsulates passion, lust, and pleasure. The article rightly acknowledges its captivating nature, comparing it to a drug that induces highs and lows. The Greeks recognized its potentially dangerous allure, tied to our primal instinct to procreate. Understanding Eros involves grasping the unique romantic and sexual feelings it elicits, setting it apart from other forms of love.
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Philia: Friendly Love The second type, Philia, emphasizes authentic and intimate friendship. This form of love is the foundation for "platonic" relationships, as coined by Greek philosopher Plato. Philia is not contingent on physical attraction, and its inclusion in the Greek taxonomy of love underscores its importance as a genuine and deep connection between friends.
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Agape: Universal Love Although the article doesn't delve into Agape, the concept of universal love is crucial to the Greek classification. Agape represents selfless, unconditional love—the kind that extends beyond personal relationships to encompass a broader, universal compassion for all beings. It's a love that transcends boundaries and expectations.
In essence, the ancient Greeks recognized the multifaceted nature of love, urging us to appreciate and cultivate various forms of connection. The article serves as a reminder to broaden our perspective and not let the intoxicating allure of romantic love blind us to the equally valuable bonds we share with friends, family, and the broader community.
