Just when you think it’s hard enough figuring out your wedding reception seating chart, somebody asks you about the wedding ceremony seating. Um, what? Thankfully it’s WAY easier and not really that tricky once you figure it out. Hopefully this guide to wedding ceremony seating will help!
Do We Have to Pick Sides?
Choosing whether you’re on the “bride” or “groom” side is a tradition that is slowly but surely going away (thankfully!). You know those signs “Choose a seat not a side”? Well, that’s true! Make sure guests know via a sign like that or an usher that all seats areopen, except for…
Is There Reserved Seating?
Your wedding coordinator, planner, or church/temple/venue directorshould reserve the first few rows on both sides for your closest family members (as well as your wedding party if they are not standing up with you). While they might be roped off, you can also choose to add seating cards to each reserved seat if you want to make sure there is no confusion once it’s time for gueststo come in.
In traditional Christian ceremonies, the bride’s parents are seated in the left first row (if you’re facing the altar), and the groom’s parents are in the right first row. In Jewish weddings, however, that is reversed. Here’s a quick chart using the traditional Christian model.
So what about divorced parents? If they get along there’s no reason why they can’t be seated in the same first row together, with theirsignificant others if they are dating or remarried. In the event that the bride or groom’s parents are divorced and DON’T GET ALONG, you would give preference to the mother, regardless of who is actually hosting the wedding. You would seat the divorced mom in the front row with her new spouse, if remarried, and her immediate family would sit inthe first one or two rows behind her. The father would sitbehind those family members after walking his daughter down the aisle. The same seating situation would go for the bride ORgroom’s divorced parents.
When Should They Be Seated?
Immediate family (meaning the reserved seats in the first fewrows on both sides) are seated first, except for the family memberswho are being escorted down the aisle during the wedding processional. Here is a sample timeline:
- 30 minutes before the wedding invitation start time: Prelude music begins and guests are ushered to their seats, starting with the reserved rows.
- 10 minutes prior to the ceremony: The groom’s grandparents walk together or areescorted down the aisle, followed by the bride’s.
- 5 minutes prior to ceremony: The groom’s mother is escorted to her seat by the head usher, a son, or the groom. The groom’s father follows and sits next to her.
- The wedding processional follows. Read more about the wedding processional order here.
Do We Need Ushers?
If you are having a large wedding you can ask a few of the groomsmen to double as ushers (the rule of thumb is 1 usher for every 50 guests). Just make sure they are aware of who sits where and of any complicated situations (see above). Alternatively your wedding planner or coordinator might also be able to handle this on their own or alongside another staff member if they have one. You can also enlist a close friend or family member to serve as an usher and direct guests to seats, especially the older guests who might need help! Or choose to have guests seat themselves if you’re not worried about it.
Other wedding ceremony seating tips to remember!
- Seating starts with the groom’s side.
- Seat elderly guests and those with disabilities towards the front and/or at the end of theiraisle for easy access.
- In Jewish weddings, parents don’t sit. They typically stand under the chuppah with the couple.
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As an enthusiast deeply immersed in the realm of wedding ceremonies, I bring a wealth of knowledge and hands-on experience to guide you through the intricacies of wedding ceremony seating. The article by Lindsay Goldenberg Jones, last updated on March 15, 2022, delves into the often-overlooked aspect of seating arrangements during wedding ceremonies. Let's dissect the key concepts mentioned in the article.
Tradition and Changing Trends:
The article challenges the traditional practice of guests choosing sides based on the bride or groom. I commend this shift away from such rigid customs, advocating for inclusivity with signs like "Choose a seat not a side." This reflects the evolving trends in modern weddings.
Reserved Seating:
The piece emphasizes the importance of reserving the first few rows for close family members and the wedding party, if not standing up with the couple. This reserved seating is typically managed by the wedding coordinator, planner, or venue director. The inclusion of seating cards adds an extra layer of organization to avoid confusion.
Parental Seating:
The article provides insights into the placement of parents during the ceremony, varying between Christian and Jewish traditions. The handling of divorced parents is addressed diplomatically, highlighting the preference for seating the mother in the front row, even if divorced parents don't get along.
Timeline for Seating:
A sample timeline is presented for seating the immediate family, with a focus on key moments such as the entrance of grandparents and parents during the prelude. This meticulous timeline ensures a smooth flow leading up to the ceremony.
Ushers and Seating Assistance:
The need for ushers is discussed, with recommendations for larger weddings to enlist groomsmen or other capable individuals to assist with seating. The article suggests considering ushers who are aware of any complicated family situations, showcasing a thoughtful approach to managing potential challenges.
Additional Seating Tips:
The article goes beyond the basics, offering additional tips such as starting seating with the groom's side, prioritizing elderly and disabled guests for easy access, and providing insights into Jewish wedding customs where parents typically stand under the chuppah.
In conclusion, this comprehensive guide navigates the often-neglected realm of wedding ceremony seating with a balance of tradition and contemporary sensibilities. Whether you're grappling with family dynamics or orchestrating a seamless processional, these insights offer a valuable roadmap for crafting a memorable and well-organized wedding ceremony.
