Wink! Flirty gesture or facial spasm? (2024)

By Diane Mapes

Most people have come to expect a certain amount of wonkiness during an election year, but last week’s vice presidential debate offered something new:winkiness.

With a half dozen blinks of her left eye, Republican Sarah Palin raised eyebrows and rampant speculation, inspiring the launch of a new Web site — palinwink.com — and prompting the British newspaper The Guardian to dub the seemingly flirtatious phenomenon, “Winkgate.”

But what exactly is a wink and what does it signify?

[Watch the first wink of thedebate by going to msnbc.com's Debate Analyzer and clicking on the question "How would you work to shrink the polarization in Washington?"]

While blinking may be necessary for healthy eyes, winking is generally a deliberate expression of personality and is a learned behavior, like snapping your fingers, rolling your tongue or raising one eyebrow, says Dr. Roy S. Rubinfeld, an ophthalmologist in the Washington, D.C. area and clinical correspondent for the American Academy of Ophthalmology.

“It’s normal for us to close our eyes, to blink; that’s a natural important element of eye health and is unconscious,” he says. “But winking is generally a conscious act, although there are medical reasons that cause people to wink or blink pathologically.”

For example, blepharospasm, which causes people to blink or wink in a spasmodic way, is one such condition. Hemifacial spasm, a neurological condition which causes one side of the face to contract, resulting in a pronounced wink which generally involves both the cheek and mouth, is another. Involuntary winks can also be caused by head injuries, particularly those involving the seventh cranial nerve — the nerve which allows you to close your eye.

But most winks aren’t due to any type of medical condition, including Gov. Palin's, says Rubinfeld.

“I would think that winking is something she’s done since she was a kid,” he says. “It’s become part of her personality and her body language.”

Interpreting what message Palin was trying to send with that particular bit of body language, however, can be tricky, says David B. Givens, director of the Center for Nonverbal Studies and author of "Love Signals: A Practical Field Guide to the Body Language of Courtship."

Winking can be a flirtatious gesture, but it’s not always meant to be sexually suggestive, Givens explains. “Winking packs a lot of different meanings,” he says. “[It can be] something you do to build rapport. It’s a friendly gesture, like laughter. It’s mildly flirtatious, but you do it with anybody.”

At least in theory.

When President George W. Bush winked at the Queen during a 2007 visit to England in an attempt to cover a verbal gaffe (he’d accidentally suggested she was more than 200 years old), HerMajesty was not amused.

In addition to being a friendly come-on, winks can also imply a knowing deception, that “you don’t believe what you’re saying,” explains Givens. “One guy will promise another guy something at a meeting and then wink to a third guy. He’s saying he’s not going to follow through. He’s being disingenuous.”

That’s where winking can become a risky choice for a politician, especially when used in a high-profile event such as a national debate.

“Winking is probably something Sarah Palin has done throughout her teenage years and her adult life,” says Givens. “She’s used it in a flirtatious or rapport-building sense, to get people on her side. But ... to me, it gave [her words] a slightly deceptive ring, like she didn’t believe what she was saying.”

As ambiguous as a wink may be, other types of body language are generally a reliable barometer of a person’s true feelings, says Givens, offering us a window into a politician’s moods and emotions. Think of George H.W. Bush famously checking his watch during his 1992 debate with Bill Clinton and Ross Perot (and again during Laura Bush’s address at the 2008 Republican convention). Or Bill Clinton’s tightly-compressed lips during the Monica Lewinsky scandal.

When it comes to Palin,the governor of Alaska'soverall body language and physical appearance are an attention-grabbing signal to men, Given feels.

“The big hair, the makeup, the dress, the smiles, the winks – it’s a message that says ‘Look at me, I’m attractive,” he says."She plays up the feminine signals to a degree that’s more noticeable than what you’d see in the average American businesswoman or politician such as Hillary Clinton or Martha Stewart.”

The Body Odd

Wink! Flirty gesture or facial spasm? (2024)

FAQs

Is winking a form of flirting? ›

For many people, a wink is a flirtatious gesture, a form of eye contact that creates a sense of collusion and intimacy between two people. This is probably the most common interpretation of the wink, especially between consenting, mutually attracted adults.

What does the wink gesture mean? ›

A wink is a facial expression made by briefly closing one eye. A wink is an informal mode of non-verbal communication usually signaling shared hidden knowledge or intent.

Is a wink suggestive? ›

A wink can be fun, teasing, flirty and — depending on the one doing (or receiving) the winking — unsettling. The meaning of a wink depends on the context, the surroundings and most of all, the two people involved. It's a shared communication.

When a woman winks at a man? ›

A wink is most commonly associated with old-school flirting. The most common interpretation of a wink is that it's a flirty gesture. After all, you see leading men and women do it in romance movies all the time.

Is 😉 always flirty? ›

Winky Face Emoji Meaning

If someone sends you a winky face, there's a good chance they like you and they're trying to sound flirty. A winking emoji may also mean the person is joking around or that they're telling you a secret.

What does 😉 mean from a woman? ›

A winking face that has a stuck-out tongue could signal she's just being silly. Respond by keeping the conversation light and playful.[1] Send a meme or continue teasing her or joking with her. For a flirty response, reply with a text that says, “😉 Stop distracting me! I'm busy.”[

Why is winking attractive? ›

Winking is quick, discreet, and suggestive, making it your best choice when trying to lure someone over to you. Joe Navarro, a body language expert and former FBI agent, added that as humans, there are only a few ways we can communicate non-verbally with someone more than a few feet away.

Is the wink emoji condescending? ›

Messages that are meant to be taken seriously or convey important information can be undermined by the inclusion of this seemingly frivolous emoji. Moreover, what one person perceives as a playful wink, another may interpret as dismissive or patronizing, further complicating the communication process.

Is a wink in a text flirting? ›

😉: The Wink as a Classic Flirt

The iconic wink emoji 😉 is often a sign of playful banter and can imply a joke with a bit of a flirtatious undertone. It's like a digital nudge to the receiver, saying “I'm being playful with you.”

Is it attractive when a girl winks? ›

Not only is eye contact a powerful, non-verbal way to communicate, it also solidifies a connection. "The reason a wink can be so sexy is the idea that you have a shared secret," Dr. Claudia Luiz, a psychoanalyst, tells Bustle. "Something between you that nobody else knows about, but has no language — just like sex."

Why did a girl wink at me? ›

Sometimes a wink is just a friendly gesture and not flirt at all. How do you know if a wink is friendly or flirting? It depends on the person doing the winking. Women tend to wink flirtatiously more than men, and men tend to wink when being sarcastic or telling jokes.

How do you tell if a girl is flirting with her eyes? ›

Notice how frequently she looks at you.

If she quickly glances away when you catch her looking, then looks back, she's likely interested in you. Smiling, holding eye contact, or raising her eyebrows are all very flirtatious things she could do in the moment.

Why do they wink at me? ›

in Western culture, we wink to show affection, to build rapport, to spark a laugh, to share a secret, and for so many other reasons. the meaning of a wink really depends on the context, the environment and the 2 people involved. a wink can be appreciated or it can be inappropriate.

What are some signs of flirting? ›

Some common flirting behaviors include smiling, making eye contact, touching or brushing against the other person, using playful or teasing language, laughing at their jokes, and mirroring their body language. Another key aspect of flirting is the subtle art of communication.

Is blinking considered flirting? ›

So, if you notice someone blinking more than usual when they're around you, it could be a sign that they're interested in you.

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