How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (2024)

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1Talking to Your Parents

2Meeting Your Parents’ Expectations

3Demonstrating Responsibility

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Tips and Warnings

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Article Summary

Co-authored byDesiree Panlilio

Last Updated: May 16, 2023

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Having your phone taken away by your parents is a relatively common punishment. Your parents may decide to take your phone away because you have abused your phone privileges. They may also decide to take your phone away as a punishment for a different mistake. It is important to understand why your parents took away your phone, discuss how to get it returned, and show your parents that you take your phone responsibilities seriously.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Talking to Your Parents

  1. 1

    Determine the best time to talk to your parents. Select a good time and place to talk to your parents. Make sure that you are in a private location such as the car or your home. Don’t begin the conversation right before a scheduled event.

  2. 2

    Discuss the problem with your parents. Calmly approach your parents so that you can talk about the problem. Your goal is to determine why your parents took your phone away. If you don’t know why your phone was taken, you will not know the best way to get it returned.

    • Give yourself time to cool off. Do not talk to your parents when you are angry with them for taking your phone.

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  3. 3

    Actively listen to your parents. When your parents talk to you about what you did wrong, make sure you are truly listening to them. Avoid thinking about what you want to say in response. Think carefully about what they are saying so that you can respond thoughtfully and respectfully.[1]

  4. 4

    Express your feelings. Reflect on your parents’ complaints. Then, tell them how this makes you feel. Discuss your side of the story with them so they have a better understanding of why the mistake happened. [2]

  5. 5

    Apologize for your mistake. Own up to your mistake and make a sincere apology to your parents. Your parents are trying to teach you a lesson by taking your phone away. The first step in recognizing and correcting your mistake is to apologize.Give them time to think and discuss it together and privately, while doing this don't ask and ask and be patient. this shows that your mature and understand that they need to talk and think. [3]

    • Avoid begging for your phone back after the apology. It is important to do what your parents have requested in order to get your phone back. Begging does not indicate a sincere apology.
  6. 6

    Discuss a plan on how to regain your phone privileges. Once you have fully discussed the problem with your parents, request a plan to get your phone back. Be sure to discuss a timeline and list of steps that you need to take.

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Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Meeting Your Parents’ Expectations

  1. 1

    Determine the owner of the phone. If you do not pay your phone bill, you must understand that the phone is not yours. Make an effort to respect the rules that have been put in place. If you are unclear about these rules, discuss them with your parents.

  2. 2

    Correct your wrongdoing. Your parents are likely to give you a set of expectations that must be met in order to get your phone returned. Work diligently to meet these expectations.

    • For example, if your phone usage costed your parents a lot of extra money, they might request that you pay that portion of the bill. Find odd jobs and chores that you can do to earn some extra money to pay off that debt to your parents.
    • If your parents took your phone away because of poor grades, study every night to ensure that your grades improve. Show your parents your next test grade to prove that you are taking your grades seriously.
  3. 3

    Consistently meet your parents’ requests. You need to prove to your parents that you take their concerns seriously and will not repeat your mistake. You can prove this to them by repeatedly meeting their requests, instead of simply meeting them when you get in trouble.

    • This will also prevent your phone from being taken away in the future.
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Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Demonstrating Responsibility

  1. 1

    Use your phone at responsible times. Once you get your phone back it is important to use it properly. Have a discussion with your parents on when you can and cannot use your phone.[4]

    • Discuss a phone curfew. Decide on a location that your phone will go at night to be charged. Determine if this curfew is different on weekends or weekdays.
    • Avoid using your phone when you are at the dinner table, in class, or driving. By understanding these basic phone etiquette rules, you are demonstrating responsibility to your parents.
  2. 2

    Avoid exceeding your monthly phone plan. If you do not pay your phone bill, you may not totally understand your phone plan. Your phone bill will be considerably more expensive if you exceed your phone plan. Discuss this plan with your parents.[5]

    • Figure out if you have unlimited minutes or a cap on your monthly minutes.
    • Determine how many texts or picture messages you can send per month.
    • Know how much data you can use and how to avoid going over your data limit.
    • Ask your parents if you have any roaming or international calling restrictions. It might cost more to make calls or send texts out of your state or country.
  3. 3

    Respect your parents’ boundaries. When your parents set boundaries for your phone usage, respect those boundaries. This is key to preventing your phone from being taken away again. Use your phone responsibly.

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Community Q&A

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  • Question

    My mom changes my phone password every night. How do I make her trust me? I've done nothing wrong.

    How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (15)

    Community Answer

    Try having a conversation with her about this. Your mom deserves to know that this upsets her. Ask her what she needs in order to trust you with your phone.

    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
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  • Question

    What if it's because of bad grades?

    How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (16)

    Community Answer

    Talk to your parents about your grades. Figure out what your grades need to be in order to get your phone returned. Then, work on keeping your grades up so you can prevent your phone from being taken again.

    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    As a small thank you, we’d like to offer you a $30 gift card (valid at GoNift.com). Use it to try out great new products and services nationwide without paying full price—wine, food delivery, clothing and more. Enjoy!Claim Your GiftIf wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission.Support wikiHow

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  • Question

    My phone was taken away and I can't find it. How can I find it?

    How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (17)

    Community Answer

    Talk to your parents about how you can get your phone back. If you steal your phone back you will probably get in even more trouble.

    Thanks! We're glad this was helpful.
    Thank you for your feedback.
    As a small thank you, we’d like to offer you a $30 gift card (valid at GoNift.com). Use it to try out great new products and services nationwide without paying full price—wine, food delivery, clothing and more. Enjoy!Claim Your GiftIf wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. We’re committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission.Support wikiHow

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      Tips

      • Don’t beg for your phone back. Discuss the proper way to get your phone returned to you.

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      • Keep your grades up to show that you're responsible and ready to have your phone returned.

        ⧼thumbs_response⧽

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      • Occasionally ask if you have been good enough. Try asking once a month but don't beg for it or you won't get it.

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      How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (18)

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      Warnings

      • Using too much data or talking on the phone for long hours can result in a huge bill.

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        Helpful41Not Helpful11

      • Despite your efforts, your parents may decide not to return your phone.

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      About This Article

      How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (33)

      Co-authored by:

      Teen Life Coach

      This article was co-authored by Desiree Panlilio. Desiree Panlilio is a Teen Life Coach and the Owner of Encouraging Teens, LLC. With over three years of experience, she specializes in helping teens and young adults define roles, set goals, develop healthy academic and personal habits, grow in leadership potential, and create their life paths. Desiree holds a BSN in Nursing from The University of Victoria and an MA in Human Services Counseling with a concentration in Life Coaching from Liberty University. This article has been viewed 723,534 times.

      5 votes - 84%

      Co-authors: 151

      Updated: May 16, 2023

      Views:723,534

      Article SummaryX

      To get your phone back after your parents take it away, try talking to them and apologizing, even if you feel like you didn't do anything wrong. It's also a good idea to wait until you're calm and collected and your parents have cooled off a bit before you talk to them so they're more likely to give your phone back. It might not be fun, but you could offer to do chores around the house or to pay your portion of the phone bill for the month in exchange for your phone. Whichever route you take, remember to act mature around your parents so you get your phone back as soon as possible. To learn different ways you can convince your parents to give you your phone back, read on!

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      How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (34)

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      How to Get Your Phone Back when Your Parents Take it Away (2024)

      FAQs

      How should I get my phone back from my parents? ›

      The first step in recognizing and correcting your mistake is to apologize. Give them time to think and discuss it together and privately, while doing this don't ask and ask and be patient. this shows that your mature and understand that they need to talk and think. Avoid begging for your phone back after the apology.

      Can my parents take away my phone if I bought it? ›

      If your parents bought the property you use and it was not a gift to you, then the property belongs to your parents. You do not have a right to take it. Anything that you bought, even if it was from allowance or gift money, is yours. Anything that was a gift to you, like a tv for your birthday, is yours.

      How do you get a phone if your parents won't let you? ›

      Planning for the conversation
      1. Show them you are responsible. Before you plan on convincing your parents to get a phone, you have to show signs of responsibility. ...
      2. Think of convincing reasons. ...
      3. Put yourself in their shoes. ...
      4. Be polite and direct. ...
      5. Use the reasons you prepared. ...
      6. If they refuse. ...
      7. If they accept.
      Oct 15, 2020

      Can your parents kick you out at 14? ›

      Children cannot petition to be emancipated until they are at least 16 years old in most states; in some places like California, minors as young as 14 can be emancipated. Once a minor is legally emancipated, parents no longer have to feed, house, or pay child support for the emancipated minor.

      How long should a 13 year old be grounded? ›

      Don't Make the Grounding Too Long

      Grounding for a week, or two or three weekends is probably sufficient to get the message across without losing it over time. A month may be too long. As the parent of a teen, a shorter time gives you a lesser chance of caving in and reducing the grounding period later.

      What age should a kid get a phone? ›

      Experts suggest that you should wait to get your kid a smartphone until at least 8th grade. Along with age, a kid's social awareness, understanding of technology, and maturity should be considered.

      Should an 11 year old have a phone? ›

      Ten to 12 is a great range because kids are still very connected to their parents and into their parents being in their phone and in their business,” says Catherine Pearlman, a licensed clinical social worker and author of “First Phone,” a guide for kids.

      Should you check your child's phone? ›

      It's 100 percent your right to check their devices,” said Bill Wiltse, President of Child Rescue Coalition. Child predators want to invade children's lives, an abuse that they may never recover from. The horrific truth is that some children are driven to suicide having suffered online abuse.

      What age should your parents stop checking your phone? ›

      The majority, 31%, say age 18 for sure. But there's also 17% who say they'll stop at age 16. There's no blanket perfect age, however. In some homes, you can trust an 8-year-old; in others you may still want or need parental controls active for much longer.

      Can my parents check my phone at 18? ›

      So realistically, if the phone was a gift to you by your parents before you were an adult, since you are now an adult you have a right to privacy in all your affairs, including your mobile phone.

      What happens if you run away from home at 13? ›

      There is no law that states a person under age eighteen running away from home is committing a crime. Minors who run away from home can be detained by police and returned to a legal guardian.

      Should a 13 year old have a phone? ›

      Many kids are ready for a phone by age 13, but this decision really boils down to your child's maturity and the phone's necessity. We'll walk you through some important considerations, the range of cell phones and smartwatches designed for kids, and some tips for controlling screen time.

      Why do your parents take your phone away? ›

      [Taking away your teen's phone can be a reflexive response to misbehavior. After all, what do they value more than their phones? And if that's your go-to punishment, you're not alone. A Pew Research Center report finds that 65 percent of parents take away cell phones or Internet privileges as punishment.

      How can I get a free new phone? ›

      Anyone enrolled in one of the following programs is eligible to get a free phone from the government:
      1. Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP)
      2. Supplemental Security Income (SSI)
      3. Medicaid.
      4. Federal Public Housing Assistance.
      5. Tribal-specific programs.
      Dec 20, 2022

      Is it illegal for my parents to kick me out? ›

      If you are considered a tenant under your state or local laws, you have the same legal protections as any other renter. This means you cannot be evicted without a court order, and likely have other legal protections as well. If you are unsure about your legal rights to stay in your family home, ask a lawyer.

      How do I kick my 19 year old out? ›

      The only way to legally start the eviction process on a child with a tenancy at will is to give him or her a 30-day notice to vacate (60-day notice if the child has been in your home more than one year) and wait the 30 or 60 days after you gave notice to allow your child to leave.

      Is it wrong to kick your child out? ›

      A parent should be the first person to help guide their struggling teen or young adult. It is dangerous to kick your kid out. Your relationship with your child may become forever strained because your child feels abandoned. They may never get over the hurt and pain caused by your decision.

      Why you shouldn't punish your child? ›

      Research shows that spanking, slapping and other forms of physical punishment don't work well to correct a child's behavior. The same holds true for yelling at or shaming a child. Beyond being ineffective, harsh physical and verbal punishments can also damage a child's long-term physical and mental health.

      How should a 13 year old behave? ›

      "Thirteen-year-olds tend to want to spend more time with their friends than with family members," Dr. Segura says. "They also start to form an identity at this age as they experiment with hobbies, activities, clothes, hairstyles, and music. They try on different identities to see what fits."

      Can a 4 year old be grounded? ›

      Limit or avoid grounding before a child is 10-12 years old.

      That is, most kids under 10-12 won't really see grounding as much of a punishment. For somewhat younger kids, though, very targeted “groundings”—banning them from playing with a certain toy or doing a certain activity, for instance—may be effective.

      What age did your child stop believing in Santa? ›

      Most Americans (67%) stopped expecting Santa to shimmy down their chimney by the time they entered seventh grade. Half (49%) of Americans say they stopped believing in Santa before the age of 10 – with a quarter (23%) reporting that they lost sight of him between the ages of seven (10%) and eight (13%).

      What age should a kid date? ›

      Eagar advises not allowing single dating before age sixteen. “There's an enormous difference between a fourteen- or fifteen-year- old and a sixteen- or seventeen-year-old in terms of life experience,” he says. You might add or subtract a year depending on how mature and responsible your youngster is.

      Should a 12 year old have a boyfriend? ›

      Typically, it's best for children under 13 not to engage in romantic relationships as they are still developing emotionally and cognitively. Healthy friendships are encouraged for teenagers between 13 and 15, but romantic relationships could be too much for them to handle.

      Is Tik Tok good for kids? ›

      Is TikTok appropriate for kids? TikTok can be a kid-friendly experience if you supervise your kids, use safety settings, and stick to songs you already know. But TikTok's emphasis on popular music means many videos include swearing and sexual lyrics, so it may not be age-appropriate for kids to use on their own.

      Is TikTok appropriate for an 11 year old? ›

      What is the Age Limit for TikTok? The minimum age for a TikTok user is 13 years old. While this is great news for younger users, it's important to note that TikTok doesn't use any age verification tools when new users sign up.

      What is Google age limit? ›

      If your child over 13 (or the applicable age in your country) wants a Google Account, they can create their own account. Then, you can add supervision to your child's account. To create a Google Account for your child, you're required to give parental consent. One way to provide consent is by using your credit card.

      Should I read my 14 year old's text messages? ›

      Reading your child's text messages is not that different than eavesdropping or reading their diary.” She advises parents to stay in their lane by steering clear of needless snooping, whether trying to find out what your kids are saying or who they are hanging out with.

      Can parents see your texts? ›

      Your parents can't monitor everything you do on your phone. They can possibly find out some things about your phone usage, like how much data you send (from the bills) or possibly where the phone is (through a tracking app). They just want to make you think they can.

      What age do kids want privacy? ›

      By age six, most kids understand the concept of privacy, and may start asking for modesty at home. Here's what you can do to honour your child's privacy. Be supportive A child's demand for privacy signals their increasing independence, says Sandy Riley, a child and adolescent therapist in Toronto.

      Why parents shouldn't take away phones? ›

      Taking away a teen's phone interferes with their social life, which can drive a wedge between parent and teen. It's helpful to make the punishment related to the misbehavior, so taking away your teen's phone for a misbehavior like breaking curfew doesn't usually make sense.

      Why is my child searching up inappropriate things? ›

      "Sometimes the assumption is that looking up content like this is a sign of abuse, but it could indicate many things. For some, it eases stress; for some, they want to be like other kids," Dr. Santos says.

      Can my parents kick me out at 18? ›

      So while you may be able to evict your child, you could still be on the hook for them financially if they can prove they are unable to support themselves. As in all legal matters, a lot depends on state and local laws. Before you start any eviction process, seeking qualified local legal help is highly advisable.

      Is it illegal for parents to track your phone? ›

      This doesn't mean that it's illegal to track a person at all; it just means that you need that person's permission. On the other hand, child-tracking cell phones are perfectly legal for parents to use. That's because the law does not require parents to obtain permission from their minor-aged children to track them.

      Why can't I talk to my parents about my feelings? ›

      Talking to a parent about mental health can be scary for a number of reasons. Many people report being afraid to tell their parents because they do not want to upset them. Sometimes we don't understand where troubling feelings or thoughts are coming from and feel guilty for having them.

      Where do runaways usually go? ›

      Very few runaways identify "the street" as their initial destination when they run away from home or care. The most common intended destinations are the homes of friends or relatives. Often, parents or caretakers know where juveniles are staying.

      What states is it illegal to run away? ›

      Against the Law

      These states are Georgia, Idaho, Kentucky, Nebraska, South Carolina, Texas, Utah, West Virginia and Wyoming, according to the American Bar Association. In these states running away from home is only illegal if the person is under eighteen.

      Is it OK to run away from home? ›

      So, while running away may be legal, it's very rarely a good idea. You should think of running away as a last resort. If you really want to run away from home or from your parents or carers, you should talk to a trusted adult like a teacher or friend's parent. There are also professionals that can help.

      Is iPhone 11 good for kids? ›

      iPhone 11: Great all-rounder that introduces kids to Face ID. Dual 12MP rear cameras, A13 Bionic chip, IP68 water resistance and nice colours make this an excellent choice.

      What age should a kid get Snapchat? ›

      Common Sense Media rates Snapchat OK for teens 16 and up, mainly because of the exposure to age-inappropriate content and the marketing ploys, such as quizzes, that collect data.

      Can my 13 year old have be real? ›

      BeReal terms & conditions state that “BeReal is open to users over the age of 13 only”.

      Why parents are so strict? ›

      Parents are strict for various reasons, some good and some self-serving. Some strict parents have high expectations. They teach their children self-discipline by holding them accountable. These parents have their kids' best interests at heart.

      What to do if phone is taken away? ›

      101 Things to Do When Your Parents Take Away Your Phone
      1. Beg for the return of your phone.
      2. Sing “Bohemian Rhapsody” in its entirety.
      3. Sketch a picture of your phone.
      4. Dream about your phone.
      5. Watch your friends use their phones.
      6. Fingerpaint.
      7. Bake cookies.
      8. Make a bowl of Easy Mac.

      How much is going to be the iPhone 14? ›

      Pricing for each model starts at: iPhone 14: $799* iPhone 14 Plus: $899* iPhone 14 Pro: $999.

      Can I get iPhone for free? ›

      Two methods of genuinely getting free iPhones come from telecom carriers. You either get a free iPhone with a new plan or some form of a trade-in deal. Either way, you will be going through a carrier. Whether you can get a free iPhone will depend on the value of your trade-in and the phone model you're selecting.

      How can I get free iPhone 11? ›

      Long story short, you can get an iPhone 11 64GB for free if you bring your number to T-Mobile from an eligible carrier and activate a qualifying voice plan. Then, you have to buy the iPhone 11 64GB on a monthly payment plan.

      Is taking away a phone positive punishment? ›

      Positive punishment is when a bad thing is added and negative punishment is when a good thing is taken away. Since a good thing is taken away to decrease the likelihood that she will repeat her action, the removal of the phone is a negative punishment.

      Why does parents take away cell phones? ›

      [Taking away your teen's phone can be a reflexive response to misbehavior. After all, what do they value more than their phones? And if that's your go-to punishment, you're not alone. A Pew Research Center report finds that 65 percent of parents take away cell phones or Internet privileges as punishment.

      Why do parents take away phones at night? ›

      It's this nightly production of melatonin that enables us to fall asleep. The bottom line: When parents take away teens' cell phones at night, they're helping to ensure this natural sleep process can occur, so their teenager can get a decent's night rest.

      At what age should parents stop checking your phone? ›

      The majority, 31%, say age 18 for sure. But there's also 17% who say they'll stop at age 16. There's no blanket perfect age, however. In some homes, you can trust an 8-year-old; in others you may still want or need parental controls active for much longer.

      Does my 13 year old need a phone? ›

      Generally, a kid who always has adult supervision does not necessarily need a phone. The adults, such as you and an after-school care provider, might already be communicating with each other as needed. Once your child is spending unsupervised time with peers, getting a phone may become more necessary.

      How long should a 15 year old be on their phone? ›

      For years, the American Academy of Pediatrics has recommended no more than two hours of screen time for children and teenagers, and absolutely no screen time for children under 2.

      What time should a 14 year old go to bed? ›

      Teens (14-17 years):

      0-2 years old: should go to sleep between 8:00 and 9:00 pm. 3-5 years old: should go to sleep between 7:00 and 8:00 pm. 6-12 years old: should go to sleep between 7:30 and 8:30 pm. 13-18 years old: should go to sleep around 10:00 pm.

      What should a 13 year old be able to do? ›

      At 13, your son can do chores around the house. They can also mow lawns for a neighbor. Earning their own cash will give them some freedom and help them be more responsible. Be a good role model.

      What time should a 14 year old come in? ›

      Chronological Age vs. Maturity
      AgeSchool NightsWeekend Nights
      12-137:00-8:009:00-10:00
      14 – 168:00 – 9:0010:00-11:00
      17+10:00-11:00Negotiable with teen

      What time should 13 year old get off phone? ›

      Yousuf said pediatricians generally recommend the following guidelines: Under 2 years old: Zero screen time, except for video chatting with family or friends. 2-5 years old: No more than one hour per day co-viewing with a parent or sibling. 5-17 years old: Generally no more than two hours per day, except for homework.

      Is it illegal to go through your child's phone? ›

      Don't do it completely in secret, and avoid using it as some form of punishment. Is it illegal to go through your child's phone? As long as your children are considered minors, you're their sole legal guardian. Add their explicit consent to be monitored for their safety, and no laws are broken.

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